Tag: distance

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“family” woe and health concerns

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Yesterday I got a call that NO ONE wants to get: my Grandma is in the hospital. I had spoken to her earlier in the week, and knew that she was having some adverse reactions to a new blood pressure medication, but I didn’t realize it was bad enough for her to need emergency transport and a hospital stay. I just talked with her, and she is feeling really good (other than having to deal with freezing hospital temperatures, and long wait times), and apparently, all of her tests are coming back normal. Whew. That makes me feel good to know that she is doing well, and it is probably that medication, as we were talking about the other day. Now, she can get a new medication (and a new doctor, IMHO), and hopefully, get back to feeling right as rain soon.

UPDATE: I just got the news that she is about to go home. YAY! I just hope that she is feeling good ASAP.

As I desperately tried to get in touch with someone who would have information after my cousin called me with that news last night (who totally came through for me, and has always been there amazingly… thanks cuz!), I was troubled that I hadn’t heard anything, and couldn’t get any information from the hospital as to her condition. After several phone calls, I finally got to talk with my Grandma around 9:30, only to find out that she was at the hospital by herself.

As of this moment, I haven’t heard a single word from either of my parents. What the fuck? As those of you that have read this blog may know, I clearly have family woes when it comes to my parents, but this just reinforces something frighteningly clear to me: the distance between us is not only geographical, and it doesn’t only apply to me. I was so angry when I talked with my Grandma, and found out that my sister’s husband was one of the people that came in the ambulance that brought my Grandma to the hospital. I was angry, because that means that not only do my parents have to know that she is in the hospital, that they neither saw it important enough to check in on her, nor alert me to her being there in the first place… and they wonder why I am “so distant”.

Care or don’t care, that is up to you, but it is glaringly clear to me what is truly important in the minds of some of my family members, and it truly makes me sad. I also wish that whole “why don’t you ever visit” mind game would stop; you KNOW why. I wish things could be different, but apparently, they are not going to get any better, and I have to deal with that. I have to deal with it, because they aren’t going to. I just hope my Grandma knows that I care, and that I am here for her; she is one of the only people that has consistently been there for me in return, and in my “family”, that is a very, very rare thing.

all about me, near and dear, show the love

picking up right where we left off…

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I had a great lunch today with one of my best friends in the whole world, who is pictured here with me. We met way back at the beginning of my freshman year of college, at a little university called Campbell University in the not-quite-a-town of Buies Creek, NC.

I met Margaret one night early in the school year, when we were all going to go out clubbing, and my first memories of her are of her cussing out some people, telling them she was going to kill them if they didn’t back their fucking car up (because they were blocking us in). Needless to say, I thought she was a bit crazy at that moment, but I was quickly proven wrong. Margaret and I quickly became best friends, spending almost every minute together. After our freshman year, we both left the school, but stayed in touch, much in the way you do with long distance friends; with only the occasional call or email or letter.

Over the years, even though we rarely saw each other, each time we did, it was like we just picked right up where we left off. There was never a reacquaintence awkward period; it was always right back to the best friends that were brought together way back in our freshman year.

When I was finishing my final semester at ECU, Margaret broke up with her then boyfriend, and felt like she had to move to warmer climates (away from Pennsylvania), and so she came to live with me. We lived together for about 5 months or so, and during that time, she was the very first person that I came out to. Margaret was there for one of the biggest things that has ever happened to me in my life, and I am grateful that she was the person that supported me in the way she did. I am glad that it was her that first heard me say those faithful words, “I’m gay”; because I could think of no one more suitable.

Margaret has always been one of those friends that has been there. I know that even though she and I hardly see each other, that she is just a phone call away, and that when we do meet up again, it will be just like old times. It is rare to have friends like this, that transcend time and distance, but Margaret is definitely one of those friends. It was great seeing her and her fiance’ today, and I can’t wait until our next meeting.

Until then… She is getting married next March, so I know that I will see her then for sure… so now I just need to focus on losing weight for the wedding!! Here’s to great friends like Margaret, who are always there in your life.