Category: show the love

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buying things will take your mind off of it…

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So James and I came home from the vet frustrated with our situation yesterday, because we really weren’t getting much in the way of answers from the people at Banfield. With our frustration, we called to speak with the vet, and honestly, she took about 15 minutes to really talk with me, which did make me feel better. She told me that we need to get the x-ray and the ultrasound, and if those don’t show anything, we need to do an endoscopy. We are taking it one thing at a time. X-ray and ultrasound are currently scheduled for Thursday, and hopefully, we will know more then.

I honestly hope that it is nothing. She thinks that it might be an ulcer or something similar, and if so, there is medication that he can take that will make him better. She also informed us that we needed to try and make him eat, which we were actually successful with last night. We are trying different types of wet dog foods, really anything, to get him to eat. We found a treat he likes, and honestly, if that is what he will eat, I will buy a bunch of it to get something in his stomach. He is still weak, but he definitely seemed better after eating last night. Also, he isn’t yelping as much anymore either; which is a great sign. Thanks to all of the well wishes and thoughts you guys, I really don’t know what I would do if anything happened to my baby, and I really hope that he will get back to his old self sooner, rather than later. I am just praying he gets better soon. I will give updates about the tests on Thursday when we get them done.

James and I were driving home from the vet yesterday, and honestly, we were just silent in the car, because we were so worried. The call with the vet changed a lot of that, but we are still concerned, and can’t think of much else. So, like the good little consumer, I have turned to a little well-timed retail therapy to help take my mind off of this week’s situation. Coincidental to these events with Sydney, two products that I have been urning for came out today:

The NEW Tivo HD receiver (the much more reasonable $300 version)
and
Guitar Hero Encore: Rocks the 80s

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I have my confirmation order number for the tivo (after getting rejected by the website, and having to call in, sit on hold, get rejected by the system, and having the customer service person (who was really sweet, and actually called back and gave me confirmation) complete the order and call my back), and I am going to pick up GH during lunch. Is this enough to make me not worry about my little man? Absolutely not. However, it really does make me feel a little bit better; even if it is momentarily.

Tonight will be some shredding at my place, and hopefully, we can get little man to eat a little more. Hope everyone is having a good day. Now, WHEN will my new tivo arrive!! HURRY!

near and dear, show the love, tragic

RIP Tammy Faye

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I just wanted to write out a few thoughts, and offer my condolences to the family of Tammy Faye; a kind, gentle, beautiful, honorable, and wonderful soul. Tammy, you will be missed. You embraced the gay community, despite the hate the Christian community wanted you to push onto us. You helped people see that we were just people, just like everyone else, and there was no need to hate us because of who we are; and we love you for that. I personally am saddened by her loss, because it is saddest when the world loses someone who truly understood love and compassion; and did not discriminate how she shared it.

May you rest in peace, you sweet, beautiful soul.

I am just glad that you no longer have to suffer, because you definitely deserve eternal happiness; as you have been a shining example of what true Christianity is supposed to be about: acceptance and love.

Thank you for caring about us; I hope that you know that we certainly cared for you in return.

You will be missed, Tammy Faye.

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thanks and thoughts

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I wanted to say thanks to everyone that sent well wishes and stuff the other day; I was just in a weird spot, and I honestly was thinking too much for my own good. I have this incredible ability to let something minuscule turn into a huge festering thing in my mind, all because I focus too much on it. I am working on that, but it is part of what I learned in how to deal with people when I was growing up. Some of that stuff never goes away, and you just have to deal with it; perhaps that is why I find that I do get let down when I expect too much from people. My parents were good at letting me down, and yet, I naively always believed that the next time, they wouldn’t; which unfortunately, almost always ended in disappointment. I am working on getting out of that, but for now, I can only go at this pace. Thanks for listening, understanding, and being here.

Sydney is doing better, although he is very lethargic and doesn’t want to move around much. I am hoping that by the end of the weekend, he is back to his normal, energetic self. I don’t like seeing him in any pain, because he really is my “baby”, and I love him so much. I am just glad that his tests came back normal, and it appears to just be a case of upset tummy. Thanks to everyone for their thoughts about him, as well.

Other than that, there isn’t really much going on in the way of “stuff” right now. I am still in a little bit of a weird place, as it was pointed out to me that I was being a little snippy at lunch with James. I was constantly on his case about his driving, because, well, he is a very easily distracted person anyway, and I really didn’t want anything to happen to him or his car. I guess sometimes, good intentions come out bitchy. Oh well… perhaps it is the rain today? Who knows… I just know I am glad that it is Friday.

Finally, a few links with some scattered thoughts:
— Surprise! A negative review of “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry” from a gay website. While I don’t really care one way or another about the movie getting good or bad reviews, it always makes me wonder about people who watch movies and criticize them, when it is clear to everyone else that the movie is going to contain the very elements that the critic negatively goes on and on about. Obviously, this movie is going to use borderline or outright negative gay stereotypes and bad humor to poke fun at what most American men see to be an uncomfortable situation; a simulated homosexual relationship between two straight men. While it may be distasteful and possibly a negative reinforcement (but probably not, since GLAAD gave it a thumbs up), if you don’t want to hear the negative gay jokes, don’t go see this movie; problem solved. I do have to say though, that I think Kevin James is absolutely adorable, and I don’t think that his part in this dumb movie will change any of that feeling from me.
— Cheney will be in charge while Bush goes under for a routine colonoscopy. I would really have loved it if the news outlets had gotten creative, and came up with creatively disgusting titles to supplement this story. However, I for one don’t know how they are actually going to get in there, with that big stick shoved up his ass, and all.
— I saw this clip of Tammy Faye when she was recently on the Larry King show, and it honestly just breaks my heart to see someone so sweet and genuinely wonderful suffering like that. Hell, I don’t like seeing anyone suffer, but Tammy Faye is good, and she totally has had our backs for a long time, showing the world what a true Christian should be like. Additionally, her son has turned out to be accepting and loving as well; not to mention, kind of hot. I love you Tammy Faye, and I hope that you are not suffering, and that your final days are peaceful and happy. You have been there for the gays, and we definitely thank you for your love, kindness, and support. If only there were more like you, Tammy Faye.

I hope everyone has a great weekend, and I am going to do my best to relax, finish the paintings I am working on, and spend time with my family (James, little Sydney, and some friends if they are interesting in hanging out). Now, I’m off to get some damn wine… I have been Cabernet-ing it up this week; I see no reason to slow up now!

happenings, hotness, listen up!, music musings, music suggestion, near and dear, show the love

the wait is over: Sara Bareilles – Little Voice in stores TODAY!!!!

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Alright kids, I may still be held up in the bed today, but that will not stop me from shouting my extreme excitement and praise for today’s release of this year’s BEST CD (Seriously, it is amazing), Sara Bareilles‘ delightfully and ironically titled debut, Little Voice.

As I have said many times before, I have been a huge fan of hers for years now, and not only am I completely honored to have met her, but I literally cannot say enough wonderful things about this amazing artist. If you are looking for the next big thing when it comes to music, look no further, because Sara is it. She blends perfect lyrics with pop harmonies that will blow you away. If you take a little bit from each of the following: Sarah McLachlan, Fiona Apple, Vanessa Carlton, and Regina Spektor; and mix it up a bit, polish it, refine it, and make it more sincere and beautiful, you would have Sara Bareilles.

I had the distinct privilege of discovering Sara’s amazing talent and music a few years ago, and I have been hooked ever since. I am elated to see that she is finally out on a major label, and if there is any justice in the world, she is going to be huge. Do yourself a favor, and go out today, and pick up the best album of 2007. Seriously, this is it, you guys… you won’t be sorry. Sara is amazing, and I am so excited to be able to tell you all about her, and better yet, be able to get her new album!!!

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I’ve got a little crush…

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YAY! We made it to Friday! I am super happy about this weekend, because I know that next week has a holiday right smack dab in the middle of the week; which always make the weekend seem that much better! Plus, everyone in my office is out on vacation, so that makes things super relaxed around here as well. Very, very nice.

Not too much going on today in duane-land, but I have to confess that I have more than a little crush (I know, misleading, aren’t I?) on Simon Pegg (who is being pulled in the picture by the also very handsome Nick Frost; which came from this great photography site). Not only is Shaun of the Dead one of my all time favorite movies, I have to say, that every time I see him, I just can’t get over how strikingly cute he is. Perhaps it is the nerd lover in me? Either way, we watched the movie Big Nothing last night, and it was quite hilarious. Simon Pegg is in it, hence today’s post… It is definitely one we will be adding to the DVD library. Dark comedies can be so fun, can’t they!? If you enjoy dark comedy, I suggest you check this one out, I liked it.

Other than that, I found out that I have $25 in reward zone cash from Best Buy. How sweet! Money for spending lots of money! I am going to swing by there and pick up something this afternoon… a treat!

Finally, does anyone have advice for selling things on eBay? I have thought about it in the past, and never followed through, but I was looking in my closet this morning at all the clothes that I no longer wear, and thought, hey, I should totally sell those on eBay! Just wanted to see what other people’s experiences were with selling on eBay, before I go barreling forward with my “new business”. HA! I always knew there would be a day those designer jeans would have a new home… perhaps that day will come sooner than expected; and in return, I can get a few extra dollars to boot!

Hope everyone has a great afternoon, and a superb weekend. Rock it!

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do you know your status?

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Your HIV status, that is. Earlier this week, I wrote about how James and I decided to get tested at this past weekend’s Atlanta Pride festival, because it had been far too long since we had tested. Even though we have always tested negative in the past, we thought it was time that we get tested again; just to verify that things were still okay (and they are, we are both negative). We are in a strictly monogamous relationship, however, it still crosses my mind every day that I should KNOW my status, rather than accepting that it is still negative, since that is how I have tested in the past. For one, it is because I work in HIV prevention, but two, it is because I love James, and want us to be healthy and happy in our relationship together. Even though we are monogamous, it is always best to be 100%, rather than 99.9% sure, and he agrees.

I am writing about this today, because today is National HIV Testing day, and I thought it was necessary to challenge each and every one of my readers to go out, get an HIV test, and find out your status, both for you and for your partner(s) sake. You owe it to yourself, and to those that you have sex with, to find out your HIV status, and maintain an active knowledge of that status for both your health, and theirs.

Now, I bet you are thinking, “but duane, I didn’t get tested a pride… where can I go get tested?”. Well, I have great news; there is this great website that let’s you put in your zip code, which generates a list of HIV testing sites that are nearby. It is just that simple: type in your zip code, find where you want to go, and go get tested.

I have said it before, but I will say it again, only you can protect yourself from HIV infection.

But, wait, what if you test negative? Obviously, that is great news for you!! But that doesn’t mean that you can just forget about HIV; you MUST continue using protection, and continue to play it safe. It will literally save your life. CDC estimates that more than 40,000 people in the US alone are infected with HIV. This is just an estimate, because not all of these people are tested each year. If you don’t know your status, chances are, your partner doesn’t know theirs either; don’t let complacency cause you to risk your life.

I hope that everyone out there that sees this post will take the initiative to go out, get tested, and urge others to do the same. The best strategy for combating HIV is prevention. And remember, it isn’t just about knowing your status, it’s what you do with that knowledge; urge others to get tested, protect yourself, and maintain an active knowledge of your status… it could save your, and your partner’s, life.

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pride, biology, orientation, and all things that make us gay

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Since this weekend is the 37th annual Atlanta Gay Pride festival, I thought I would reflect a little on pride, and what better way to do that, that with an article a flickr pal of mine sent to me about the biology of homosexuality? The article talks about current studies that are being conducted, many of which are looking at various biological trends in humans that indicate a biological representation of homosexuality. It builds on the studies from the past that looked at things like the differences in the hypothalamus (which was seen to be noticably different in homosexual men), and also looks at other interesting things potentially linked to your propensity to be gay, like being the youngest boy in your family, the length of your fingers, the direction of the whorl in your hair, and many other biological traits. What it goes on to show, is that the representation of these traits are sometimes significantly different for gay men, and even lesbian women, and as such, may prove to be biological markers that can be used to truly say that homosexuality is biologically determined.

While there is a lot covered in the article, and there are a lot of different points made, I thought it was interesting that first of all, we need to prove that homosexuality is somehow biological. I see how this proof would end the discussion that homosexuality was a choice, but it does open up a whole new can of worms, which is best summed up with this statement from the article:

If sexual orientation is biological, and we are learning to identify how it happens inside the uterus, doesn’t it suggest a future in which gay people can be prevented?

It appears that there is also some research looking at the possibility of genetic markers that “cause” homosexuality, and while they aren’t confirmed, it does sound both intriguing, and scary at the same time. I for one can’t imagine what would happen if it turns out that homosexuality is inherently genetic, and they do, then, start searching for a cure. (Additionally, I should note that the conclusion that lesbians are somehow “less homosexual” or even “more fluid” with their sexuality, because they haven’t identified as many markers in women is NOT something I endorse or agree with. Jumping to conclusions without research to back it up is dangerous and stupid.)

The whole notion of “curing homosexuality” is a scary thing, because I for one, don’t think that homosexuality is a disease, and as such, it certainly doesn’t need a “cure”. I am extremely proud of who I am, and being gay is a large part of that. I think that if I were meant to be born straight, I would have been. Plain and simple. I know that everyone doesn’t share my sentiment, especially those that hate themselves because they were born gay, but think about this: being gay, if it is truly biological, is essentially the same as if you were born black, red-haired, blue-eyed, female, or any other non-harmful biologically identifiable trait. The point is, that if it was meant to be, it would be. That is the way nature works.

But what about diseases, and genetically defective biological traits that can be identified and cured? Does this mean that I think that we should just let those diseases that can be prevented with genetic suppression go unchecked? No, I think that is a different argument, mainly because being gay has absolutely no provable detriment to a person’s life; other than, of course, the environmental and external influences that affect us. And we all know that just because you are gay doesn’t mean that you will be subjected to these influences, and just because you are straight, doesn’t mean you will be immune to them.

While being gay may be a “harder” life because of all that we face; discrimination, degradation, violence, hatred, etc, it is a life that we have lived, and because of what we go through, it shapes us into who we are. We are made up of both our biological selves that were given to us at birth, and we grow and are shaped by our experiences, and become who we are by combination of the two.

Now, I know for a fact that my experiences didn’t make me gay, but, they did happen to me because I am gay, and they helped me become who I am today. I am a proud, out, gay man, and I know what I know because of the journey I have been on to this point in my life. It is the journey, and what I have made from it, that I celebrate this weekend, and it is my hope that this important aspect of each gay person’s life is not lost if and when biological determinants are truly, and irrefutably identified.

Unfortunately, I am realistic about the world we live in, and I fear that the hateful, bigoted, religious extremists will force the issue of screening for these biological traits, in an effort to make gay people inferior. Even more, I fear that they will go further, and try to eliminate gay people from being born.

I hope that just because we identify that being gay isn’t because “you took dance instead of playing basketball”, and that it is because “you were born biologically homosexual”; people will NOT seek to eliminate the biological traits that make us special, unique, and wonderful.

Being gay is being different.
Being gay is being who we were born to be.
Being gay is who I am.
Being gay is who many others are as well.
Being gay is normal.

We are no less human, nor any less worthy of our lives as gay people, than anyone who is black, female, blonde haired, or left-handed is worthy of their life as who they were born. I hope that we can continue to live in a diverse world that begins to see these studies as a means of acceptance, and not as a means of elimination.

Given the tone this article has the potential to set, I for one, want to focus on the pride that I have for who I am, the community that I identify myself with, and what it means to sit here, typing this post as a proud gay man. It has been a long journey, but I know that I have a long way to go; and I couldn’t be happier that I get to take the journey myself. This weekend, I will celebrate this with my fellow gays in Atlanta, and it will be a beautiful thing. After the weekend, I will tell you all about it. Come out and see us if you can!

Happy Pride, y’all.

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red panda tattoo, phase one

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red panda tattoo, phase one, originally uploaded by duanecmoody.

It’s time to gawk and stare, bitches. Behold, the first phase of my bad-ass red panda tattoo, as done by the amazing Russ Abbott.

I admit, it is a bit bigger than I was expecting, but so what, I love it. I can’t wait until it is finished! I am just happy that Russ was able to do as much as he did last night! Surprisingly, it didn’t really hurt that bad either. The calf is definitely the place to get tattooed.

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it’s all about promotion, baby!

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Two HUGE promotions today folks… are you ready?

First of all, I want to promote the intensely amazing news that Sara Bareilles‘ single, Love Song, is the free download of the week on iTunes!!! This is great news, because it will definitely give people an opportunity to discover her amazing talent for free!! I hope that this will garner the sort of attention that it has for many people whose singles were featured there in the past.

Click on this banner to take you to iTunes, where you can download the single Love Song for free!! (but hurry… it’s THIS WEEK ONLY!) I know you will love it (!!):

Additionally, there is a special pre-order deal going on right now; if you order her upcoming debut CD, Little Voice, over at the Sony music store, you can get a free hand-numbered lithograph of either the lyrics for the amazing song Gravity, or for the aforementioned single, Love Song! I went ahead and ordered mine, and I can’t wait for it to get here!! The CD comes out on July 3rd, so pay attention to this amazing artist, because she is going to be huge if there is any justice in this world!

The second promotion I want to blog about today, is the grand opening of the new tattoo shop, Ink and Dagger Tattoo, owned by my amazing tattoo artist, Russ Abbott. Russ did the amazing half-sleeve that I have, as well as some other work, and I can definitely say that he will be the one that I go to, in order to get any future work for me! He’s amazing! He’s actually doing a piece for me tomorrow, which you will just have to wait and see when it is complete. I will be dropping by the shop to check it out tonight, and I am so excited for him, that he has his own shop now! If you are in need of an amazing tattoo, look no further than Ink and Dagger Tattoo in Decatur, GA, because both artists at the shop (Russ and Malia) are top of the line, and will give you a work of art that you can cherish for the rest of your life.

Whew! Now that is a lot to be excited about!! Hope everyone is having a great Tuesday, and make sure you check out these people I am promoting… you will love them! I certainly do!

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reconnecting and wow, time flies

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It all started yesterday morning; I got several emails and comments from an old friend from college, one who I haven’t seen or spoken to in years. I was so shocked, because this friend was such a close friend, and when I moved away from college, we fell out of touch. I know now, that it was because of several changing aspects of my life (I came out right after college, which was MOST of the reason I just went forward, without looking back) that led to rapid changes, and leaving old friends behind; but that doesn’t mean that I ever forgot about them. And hearing from her was such an amazing surprise.

It was amazing to hear how much things have changed (she got married and has 2 kids!) in the last 7 years, and it really makes you realize how quickly things can shift and change, as well as how quickly time flies. We ended up talking on the phone last night for the first time in years, and it was as if we had seen each other the day before (but with more stories, of course); and it was great! There are very few people in your life that will have an impact on you, and Vanessa definitely had a huge impact on my life (as well as Beth, whom I am looking forward to reconnecting with soon too! Email me!). While I do regret that we lost touch for so long, I must say, that reconnecting is probably the best thing ever, because it clearly highlights that there is no reason for us to lose touch again. We have to hold onto those special connections in our lives, and this is a very good reminder of how important it is to do just that.

I was seriously on cloud nine last night, because it was amazing to reconnect with someone that I am so close to, even though it has been years since we have seen each other. I also makes me reflect on the changes and choices we make in our lives, and it makes me want to stop for a moment and think about how some of those changes have affected me, and my connections with others. I can honestly say that there are very few people in my life that I would truly consider “best” friends (I know that best indicates one, but I have a few, alright!), and I am just in shock that I was lucky enough to reconnect with one of mine. (Thanks Vanessa for contacting me!!) This blog, if it has served no other purpose than to give me room to share my thoughts and opinions, I can definitely say that it has provided an opportunity for me to reconnect with someone very special to me, that I haven’t seen in years.

How awesome is this world that we live in, that even though time, distance, hundreds of miles, several years, and everything in between can separate us for whatever reason, that sometimes, if we are lucky, we can come back to what matters most to us at some point in the future? Thank goodness for the internets!! You have served me well old friend!! And thanks to Vanessa for googleing me! I am just elated to day, ya’ll… That’s all I can say really; I am just happy to have been lucky enough to reconnect with a great friend, and I totally look forward to making sure that we don’t lose touch again!