Category: is it just me?

all about me, is it just me?, movie musings, the catch-all-egory

back to the heat, back to the grind

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Well, I survived Rochester, NY. I guess I didn’t mention WHERE I was going this weekend for work, and I honestly don’t have a reason for not doing so… just an oversight.

Either way, I had to work all day Saturday, and then was tied up with travel and airport nonsense all day Sunday. Sitting here in my office on a Monday, it really doesn’t feel like Monday at all. I am going to make some of that up by taking off time this weekend… because it’s birthday weekend!

My birthday is on Sunday, so if you want to do something, let me know. I don’t really do parties or big dinners, but would love to just spend time with friends. Also, if you feel so inclined, you can purchase me something shiny and new from one of my amazon wish-lists; which are right there on the right column under “more than just a blog”. But don’t feel obligated, okay?

Overall, the weekend was nice. The weather in Rochester was unbelievably amazing. So much so, that I will seriously consider moving north once I get my nursing degree. It was really nice to walk around in 50-60 degree weather after leaving the sweltering coal furnace that is Atlanta. On Saturday, I went to the movies and to dinner with one of my coworkers, and that was nice, because I really felt we have never really connected before. We saw The Invasion (which was okay), and had dinner before saying goodnight. It was good conversation the whole time. I also managed to have a little one on one time with another coworker who I had connected with, and it was great getting to know her. I look forward to getting to know her better too! I guess some good can come out of working on the weekends, eh?

Classes officially started for me at GPC today. For those that don’t know, I am taking a few prerequisites for nursing school at GPC, and luckily, I get to take some of them online. I have signed on and looked at the stuff, but haven’t gotten my books yet, so I will probably do that tomorrow, and I will then try to get a little ahead in each of my classes. Man, going back to school after so many years is weird, but I just hope it is a good experience! I am sure that I will have updates on that from time to time… so stay tuned.

Hope everyone is having a great Monday… mind feels like Wednesday or something!

all about me, is it just me?, tragic, well?

weekend recap

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This weekend, my awesome cousin came for a visit, and we had a blast. Photo strolls with Deb, brunch with Deb, Anne, Syd, and the girls, and hanging out with friends and watching movies. Yesterday, I took off work, and we braved the aquarium, because our initial plan of taking pictures at the botanical gardens was a no-go; the gardens are closed on Mondays. Overall, it was a great visit, and it just makes me wish that I lived closer to my real family. There aren’t many of them, and I would certainly love to be able to see them more often. Either way, the weekend was a warmly welcomed great time. Also, she completely hooked me up with a new lens for my camera; in exchange for a ticket to come visit in the future. Done and done!! Now, I definitely have to practice shooting with my new Canon 70-300mm IS lens! It is the bomb! Thanks cuz!

Something else interesting from this weekend: this weekend was my mother’s birthday, Saturday to be exact. While the fact that it was her birthday isn’t that interesting, I do find it kind of telling that my father and sister planned a huge surprise party for her, and guess who wasn’t even invited? Yup. That’s right. Now, I am sure that they just told themselves that I probably wouldn’t be able to make it anyway, but, isn’t it the minimum amount of courtesy to simply extend the invitation? I mean, it would have at least shown that there was some level of consideration for me; but alas, I should have expected what I got, because it is more of the same. Perhaps this is a symbol that they too are moving on? Soon, I suspect that the traditional calls on birthdays and other holidays will fade into silence; much like any other gestures of having anything to do with my life at all. Interestingly enough, my sister called (on Saturday) to remind me to call my mother, to which I said that I was going to do so later; after the party had begun. That way, I could say my piece about happy birthday this and that, and do what I am sure she really wanted; let her get back to her life, and leave her alone. So, that’s exactly what I did.

Maybe next year, I won’t even bother to call at all. Funny, I doubt they would even notice. Oh well… such is life, eh?

is it just me?, mixed media, venting, well?

hey comcASS, suck my DICK

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Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!
oh, and by the way…
Fuck you Comcast!!!!!!

Yeah, so you can probably guess; they just left my house. Not only did they only bring 1, that’s right, I said 1, cableCARD, even though I called twice to MAKE SURE that they would be bringing two, the stupid TURD that they sent out to the house acted like an asshole the entire time he was here. Basically, he explained to me, that despite that fact that the Tivo HD works on cableCARD technology, that it is actually not where you are supposed to put the cableCARD. In fact, he called his dipshit “supervisor”, who said that cableCARDS don’t go into Tivos. Wow, that’s weird, considering that I put it in the Tivo while he watched me, and gave him the access number from the Tivo cableCARD set up screen.

I have to say, that it really doesn’t bother me that I have to pay for services, but when it comes to Comcast, you get the absolute lowest of the low service, and frankly, I fucking tired of this company having me by the balls. There are no other options for cable in Atlanta, and because of the trees around our house, we are not so sure about satellite options. Why is it, if there is a non-monopoly law in the US, that shitty companies like Comcast are given free, and single, reign over regions of the country?

All I know, is that now, I have to call the Comcast “customer service” number AGAIN, so that I can set up ANOTHER appointment for another one of their fuck-face employees to bumble is dumb ass out to my house and bring me the cableCARD that today’s dipshit was supposed to bring.

Man… I really love Comcast! Fuck off assholes!

UPDATE: Probably by a HUGE mistake on their part, the dude actually brought me a multi-stream cableCARD, which means, I only need the one! HA!

hmm interesting, hotness, is it just me?, mixed media, sex (oh yeah), that is so gay, well?

humor… or just hot?

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It is no secret that the media loves to “push the envelope” by attempting to bring “humor” out of situations that, for whatever reason, they believe the “straight male” will find humorous; particularly, the depiction of gay kissing, groping, etc. Clearly evidenced by the recent movie “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry”, it is clear that there is a fascination with man on man action, and whether it is used to attempt humor, or whether it is used to simply make fun of, one thing is certain; it definitely garners attention.

Many times, the attempt at “humor” will bring negative attention from the gay community, like with the Snickers ad that was played during the Superbowl; mostly because it crosses a line between being funny, and instead, seeks to make fun of someone/something. I think that regardless of where that line may lie, there is no denying that there is a constant obsession on man-on-man action; which is clearly evidenced by this ad campaign. The campaign is trying to get Londoners to come to Paris, and in this ad, they are showing how Paris is not only the city of love, but that it is also the city of humor. However, I have to ask; how is this ad humorous? Is it funny that men would kiss and grope one another in a clearly sexual position?

While I will admit that I am not an expert with regards to rugby, I know one thing for certain; rugby is a really hot sport to watch, and the players are a real distraction (i.e., they are hot). The grittiness of this contact sport, practices like a “scrum”, and the other close cornered activity that goes on during a match make this a visual delight for men that are sexually attracted to men (regardless if that is the intention or not). Additionally, I would argue that seeing the activities of the sport acted out, undeniably provide a visual display that borderlines on porn (or as Mark Simpson brilliantly calls it: sporno). What I find interesting, is that the men that are viewing these games and images of this sport (and others), along with the advertisers and the sports promoters, continue to pretend that these images and portrayals of “sporno” are not interesting to them sexually; even though they go the extra mile to portray them in such a sexual manner. I have to wonder; is it really done for humor, or is there some part of them that really thinks that it is just hot? If not, then why the emphasis on the more attractive men, and more sexually charged advertising?

I will gladly admit that this image is a distraction for me. I could just stare at it for a long time. I don’t think many would deny that this image is very sexual, and to many, extremely hot. I also think that was at least, at a bare minimum, part of the point, and I find it interesting that the motivation to make it so hot is there. This is especially interesting, considering the fact that straight men are “supposed to” “lack” sexual interest in the situation. I mean, you’ve seen a Men’s Health magazine, haven’t you? You can’t tell me that the images that they use in that magazine are geared towards men who are “so-called” “disgusted with the thought of gay sex”! It is practically a skin mag!

I mean, if men want to continue to deny that they are not looking because at least a tiny part of them is interested, intrigued, or at least on a small level, attracted to the image of the male form, that is fine, I actually have no problem with that whatsoever. However, I do ask that they keep bringing the goods, without crossing that line I mentioned earlier. I don’t care if they created this image for their ad campaign under the potentially false guise that it was “humorous”; because it clearly shows that there is a continued fascination with man-on-man action. The best thing about this ad, is that it does it in a way that is both subtle, as well as fucking hot.

I will always be fascinated by the fact that there is so much obsession with the male body, and even man-on-man sex, from straight men, especially when you consider that so many men will wince at the thought of two men kissing. It’s like the line that Christina Ricci delivered in the movie the Opposite of Sex:

Can I just say to all the girls out there…if you’re with a guy who groaned or made some crack during that little kiss…you’re with what we call a closet case. That’s the number one tip-off. Number two is if they freak out about gays in the military. You know, if they can’t discuss it without giggling about showering with guys…and bending over for soap and stuff. That’s not good. Real straight guys don’t spend a whole lot of time thinking about wet naked men, if you ask me.

While I think that she really has a point, I don’t think that just because a man thinks about other men, it necessarily makes him a closet case, or even gay. I think that we all have a fascination with the physical body, and men are naturally visual creatures. Also, I think that it would be correct to assume that men can appreciate, and possibly even enjoy, the visual aspects of the male body (or the actions in which it partakes). Regardless of the potential for wincing and making lewd comments, all while (possibly) secretly thinking that, “yeah, well, that is kinda hot”; I am just glad that they didn’t cross the line, and instead, went the extra mile for those of us that actually do enjoy seeing images like this. I for one, am very, very happy.

You’ve heard my spiel, so I want to know: what do you guys think? Do you think that there can be an appreciation for the male body without having to believe that you are gay, and therefore, freak out about it? I mean, there is so much homo-erotic subtext in sports, fraternities, and other male bonding rituals, that it can’t just be coincidental that men think about other men in “that way”; even though they don’t necessarily want to act on it. I think that if more men would just be okay with the presence of a potential “gay” feeling every now and then, the world would be a lot better place, you know? I would love to hear your thoughts on this; being the eternal anthropologist, this sort of thing is my bread and butter.

is it just me?, near and dear, politics, public health, tragic, venting, well?, wtf?!

why don’t we help the sick?

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I read this article this morning, and frankly, it made me mad. I mean, we spend so much money on so many things that we shouldn’t, and yet, we cut funding that provides for those suffering from AIDS (which I definitely think anyone can agree that is something that is important). The weird thing about these cuts, is that AIDS cases, and the needs of those afflicted with HIV/AIDS, are increasing every year. It is estimated that 40k new cases of HIV a year are diagnosed in the US alone, and of those cases, many of them are being found among the minorities and poor of this country. Adding insult to injury, the drugs, treatment, care, and supplies that they need to live on are exuberantly priced, and as such, they are in a lose-lose situation.

Since we know this, where is the (moral?) justification for cutting the funding provided for these things, that work to provide people with services? This is a clear example of how we lack a basic sense of true social security in our nation. Frankly, it scares me on another level, because it shows how, as a society, we are lacking the area of compassion, even when we have more than enough means to make it reality. What’s probably worse, is that this happens to those that are in an area where it is truly deserved; because of the nature of the system that our society operates within.

When I read things like this, I think, what’s next? Throwing old people out of their homes, and using their social security checks to beef up military contracts? When are we going to focus more on the “homeland” that we are supposedly doing so much to protect? I ask, because we constantly hear about protecting “this great nation”, and securing freedom and safety for the citizens of this country, all while we constantly shift our efforts away from the actual people that need our help in this country. It seems that we are only securing the “homeland” for a select few; those that are lucky enough not to get sick, and that have found themselves in a position of wealth without bad luck, or worse, failure.

The scary thing, is that the rich will be just fine, and the poor will just die out, if this continues. The middle class will become the new poor, and eventually, we will die out too. This is a bleak and realistic future for our country if we continue down this ridiculous track; so I ask, why don’t we help the sick? Is it inconceivable to think that, not only do we have the money to take care of every medical funding problem we currently face, we give it to contracts and a handful of corporations, instead of our own people? I don’t think that these are shocking revelations, so why isn’t it something that is being taken care of? Oh yeah… why would you give money to a poor person, when you are too greedy to do so, and instead, want it, and more, for yourself?

Earlier today I was misclassified as following current democratic trains of thought with regards to the war, and as I stated, I don’t always agree with what anyone in politics does. I find a lot of corruption, and not a lot of true philanthropic action. As of right now, I feel alone. The politicians are not people that truly represent the little guys (and increasingly, not even us “middle” guys), and funding cuts like this make it more and more clear that there is no interest in actually making this nation great for anyone other than the elite. There is no definitive compassion that comes without a bribe, an accompanying lobbyist, or greedy grin. I think that I am going to be sick the more I think about this; I just hope that I can afford to take care of myself, because my society is not willing help me out.

I feel helpless right now, and that just sucks. I am having the same feelings I had when I read Joseph’s post the other day, because it comes from the same line of thinking, only his has a specific focus on what we will do when we get older. If you don’t have the money, and your family will not, or cannot, take care of you, you are seriously fucked; the government is probably not coming to your aid. That is what these AIDS patients are facing, and I just don’t understand how that is okay. That is scary, but real, and I frankly am worried as hell.

Speaking of helpless, I read this article, and it made me so utterly sad for that kid (as well as other people that are disregarded in the name of “saving” them). Sometimes, I question what people really are doing when they say that they are working for the good of mankind; because sometimes (and more often than not it seems), it seems that they got it so wrong, that by their method of “helping”, they are causing way more harm than good. Frustrating.

all about me, blog on blog, happenings, is it just me?, mixed media, music musings, music suggestion, the catch-all-egory, venting, wtf?!

alright monday… move on, now…

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Today seems to be dragging a bit; perhaps I have a case of the “Mondays”? Either way, I can’t wait to get home this evening. Ah, relaxing… the joy of life.

A few jumbled, scattered, smothered, and covered thoughts for you to swish around your brain today:
Because everyone else is doing it, here is my “personality” profile; which is based on some pretty random questions. I expected pretty much everything, I have done a Myers-Briggs before, so nothing too unexpected, I guess… One thing I did get excited about, was that Nurse was listed as one of my career matches; maybe I should have taken this little test while I was in college? Either way, that is good to know that it will mesh well with my “advocate” personality style. I don’t really think these things are 100% accurate, but I do see how they can be pretty good generalizations.

All I have to say, is BWAHAHAHAHA!: Paris Hilton loses her $60 million inheritance because of her dumb ass behavior. Her grandpa is like, look Paris, too much ass, drinking, and going to jail is tainting my name, so you aren’t getting my dough! I wonder if she will have to work and earn money like the rest of us? If so, I fear for her, because I have seen the Simple Life, and if she has to rely solely on her “skills” (or lack thereof), she is royally fucked. I don’t think that she would even be able to get enough money to buy food for herself, if she actually had to work for a living. Poor, poor Paris… However, we all know that she will come out on top somehow; people like her always do for some reason.

Just because there are some people that still think the people of Iraq are all “Islamic extremists” out to kill us, which has nothing to do with any of our actions against them, their land, or their way of life; here’s more compelling evidence that all we are doing over there is making things worse (for us and them). I don’t get why pointing out the obvious stain that you made on the rug, and suggesting that it be cleaned up, is such a “radical” and “scary” observation and strategy for change. The shit has more than hit the fan, and it is pretty crystal clear that there are more and more people, who are just getting more and more angry at us for the very reason illustrated in the article; we are doing more harm than good, and always have. I have an idea, why not stop doing all that “destruction and death” mumbo jumbo, and focus on what we are SAYING really matters; helping the people of Iraq and ending terrorist plots against the US? I suggest this, because we are currently not doing that at all, and instead, our presence is making it worse; both for the Iraqis, and for us, because we are giving them more and more reasons to hate us. Another “revelation” courteous of the “omg this is so fucking obvious” news.

I was thinking as I was driving in to work this morning that I want to start what I hope will be something of a regular here: weekly music suggestion(s), that we share, explore, and recommend to each other. I am always hungry for new music, and often times, it can be hard to find. So, in the spirit of getting this thing going, I am going to recommend a few selections for you to check out this week. As evidenced by today’s selections, the recommendations do not necessarily have to be “new” as in “just out”; if it is new to you, it counts as new! Also, if it is something that you have heard and like, maybe it will just make it a rediscovery for you!

Here’s your music suggestions for this week:
Imogen Heap: Speak For Yourself (I popped this back in the CD player this morning on a whim, and was reminded at how fantastic this disc is!)
SIlversun Pickups: Carnavas (this CD is so awesome; I wish I would have discovered it sooner)
And sort of in the middle of the two: Great Northern: Trading Twilight for Daylight (fyi… this is a myspace link, which I am convinced is the only reason that myspace should even exist: marketing) (This IS new, and I am currently listening to/getting into it. Initial listens are definitely yielding a positive vibe… I am feeling that same little tingle in my body that I get when I hear Silversun Pickups… it’s a good thing.)

This whole “music sharing” idea was further pushed by my stopping by a little CD shop during my lunch break, and my finding Jude’s King Of Yesterday CD in the $1 bin. I had heard the song “King of Yesterday” on Felicity years ago, and remembered that I really liked it, and so I picked up the album. Always good to check out new things, right?

Now that you have your “Music Assignments”, hook me up with some suggestions too; this ain’t a one way street bitches!!! Bring on the music! Bring on the noise!

all about me, hmm interesting, is it just me?, listen up!, near and dear, show the love, tragic, venting, well?, wtf?!

post ultrasound sydney update

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So, we had the ultrasound done yesterday… $400 to find out, wait for it… Nothing. That’s right, there isn’t anything abnormal with his abdomen, stomach, nadda. However, it may have been worth it to spend the $400, because when I got into the vet’s office yesterday morning, (I wanted to stick around and talk to them so that I could tell them a few things that I wanted checked out) Sydney was transformed into his old self. Wagging his tail, jumping up into my lap, and full of energy. Maybe he was faking it? Maybe he was a little sick, and just didn’t feel like eating? Either way, after we picked him up yesterday afternoon, he proceeded to eat treats (without having them crushed first), walk around, wag his tail, jump up on the couch, and everything he normally does.

He is also eating out of his bowl on his own, without being coxed into it. I am not sure if it is a case of “don’t take me back there, see, see!, I am good! nothing to worry about!!!”, or if he really is getting back to his old self, and it was more of an episode, rather than something actually wrong. I hope that it was definitely just a little bout of upset tummy, or something minor, and I am glad that he is getting back to normal. It’s funny, because it is almost like we took him in, and got our old Sydney back. I just hope that his eating improves, and he gets back to normal. He even wanted to play with his toys last night! What a little stinker, eh? I honestly don’t care what was going on, so long as he is better, and a happy, healthy little dog. Thanks to everyone that had kind words and well wishes; it really means a lot to know that people were thinking about us!!!

Totally unrelated to Sydney’s health drama this week, we had/have a bit of a situation at the house… Basically, a few days ago, we saw an injured cat slink its way under the deck; before we could do anything to help it/stop it. A day or so later, we were greeted with that all too familiar smell of rotting carcass when we walked our of the front door, and I was sure that the damn cat died under the porch, and we were going to have to endure that smell for at least a few more days (my cat used to drag us “presents” under the porch when I lived with my parents… yuck). The situation comes into play when yesterday, we walked outside to do something, and James exclaims, “Oh my god! There’s a dead cat in the koi pond!”. Sure enough, the carcass of that cat was tangled in the net of the pond, COVERED in maggots and flies. I almost threw up. I told James that it had to be gotten out of there ASAP, or it would kill all of the fish, and he sprung into action. He managed to clean out most of the “debris”, but I noticed this morning that there are still a ton of maggots in the pond, and we seriously need to figure out how to get them out of there so they don’t kill the fish. I am glad that the dead cat smell is gone, but jeez… that is not the alternative plan of action I was expecting; nor the one that I wanted. Yuck!

The whole cat scenario, which, by the way, is our third serious cat incident since we have lived at our house, totally echoes (although, not on the same threat level) what Lori and Brian when through this morning; people that neglect animals, and don’t get them spayed and neutered are just AWFUL fucking people. Seriously, if you don’t intend to get an animal the care that it needs, provide it with food and shelter, and make sure that it isn’t unnecessarily breeding animals that you have no intention of taking care of, you are at the very minimum, a despicable person. Perhaps we should call animal services more than we do, but honestly, they are so picky about what they will do, it really makes it more of our problem than anything. I just wish people weren’t so neglectful, and by association, cruel. It’s an animal dammit, it NEEDS you. Don’t get one if you don’t plan on taking care of it. UGH! /endrant.

all about me, happenings, hmm interesting, is it just me?, mixed media, tragic, wtf?!

excuse me, is that YOUR blower?

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I didn’t think so!

Yesterday evening, I went outside with Sydney to watch him while he went potty, and I noticed that the handles on the shed were broken off, and hanging on by a little piece of plastic. Naturally, I thought, “well James has gone and broken this damn thing!”, so I asked him. Nope, turns out, he had just been in the shed about an hour before, after which, he went to the gym, leaving me and Sydney at the house.

While he was at the gym, someone came around the back of the house, jumped over the fence, and used a huge pipe to smash the handles off of the storage shed. We looked, and all we could see that he had taken was our leaf blower. Naturally, we were pretty freaked out, and we went back and looked at the footage of the theft from the security cameras. We got a visual of the criminal, and mulled over whether or not to go through the process of filing a police report; because when things have been stolen in the past, they have been very “oh well” about it.

We decided against filing a report at that time, and instead, James headed to Lowes to get some materials to make a new lock and securing mechanism (since the handles had been completely smashed off). Before he came home, the phone rings, and James quickly tells me that I need to call 911, because the guy is back! I had all of the lights in the back of the house off, so when I called 911, I walked back there, and sure enough, I could see him right at the fence (on the outside at this point), getting ready to jump into the yard!!! Needless to say, I was REALLY freaked out, and the 911 operator was listening to the whole scenario. I described the guy to her, and she relayed that message to the cop that was on the way.

The guy must have seen James’ car, because right as James came up the road behind our house, the guy stopped his plan of breaking back into the shed, and bolted. I couldn’t see where he went, and James took off (against my wishes) to find him. I stayed on the phone with the 911 operator until the cop arrived a good 20 minutes later. By then, James had seen a local man in the neighborhood that is well known for cutting people’s grass, and asked him if he knew the guy; and he did! Now, we know the guy’s name, and we relayed all of that information to the police.

You would think with that much information, they would act on it, or at least follow up, but nope; all he did was take a police report. While I am glad that the guy was “caught in the act”, and wasn’t able to steal anything else, I am still a little mad that he got away with it scott-free. I was also surprised at how ballsy it was for him to come back the same day, especially considering that we now know that he lives nearby. Hopefully, it is the last we will see of him; but if he does come back, the lock will be a lot more difficult for him to break this time around.

Things like this really freak me out, because it just makes you realize that there are people out there that will just take whatever they want, and they don’t care that it doesn’t belong to them. It was also creepy that I was home BOTH times he came to the house. I am just glad that it was only a petty theft, and that the whole thing is (HOPEFULLY) over.

In other news, my tivo has been shipped, and should arrive in 6 business days. ROCK! Speaking of ROCK, I beat the medium mode on GH: Encore last night where I got 5 stars on each song on the first try. WTF?! Either it is much easier than the other GH games, or I am a lot better… or both. Either way, it is a fun game, and I look forward to getting into the Hard mode next. I am disappointed that you can’t buy new songs, but GH:III is right around the corner, and hopefully, not to far out. I can’t wait for that game!

all about me, hmm interesting, is it just me?, near and dear

I think that I expect too much sometimes

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Perhaps all of the time.

I think that I get my feelings hurt, or am disappointed, because I expect too much. Is it possible, that I put too much thought, guilt, worry, or anxiety into relationships, so much so, that I inadvertently cause the situation to go all weird? I wouldn’t think that this would be the case, because if it were, it would be the standard; and it isn’t.

I mean, I really don’t think that I do any of this outwardly, or even on purpose, but for whatever reason, I feel like there must be something that I do that makes people change. It is the only solution that I can come up with, although, it is really the only one that I can truly substantiate if it is reality. Again, I probably am over-analyzing things, but what if I am not? What if there is something that I do, something small, that causes these changes in my relationships with other people?

Maybe I expect too much. I don’t think that I do, but maybe I do… Maybe that is more of the problem than the actual situations that I find myself in from time to time; expecting too much will always mean that I am the one that is let down. I don’t know how I find myself here all of the time, but here I am, and it really upsets me. It really breaks you down to feel this way so much, and very rarely gain any resolve for the situation.

So why do I keep doing it? Why can’t I stop thinking for one minute, and just let things travel on their own? I honestly don’t know, but I know that I have always been this way, and if it is the problem, it is more than frustrating; it is debilitating and very upsetting, especially because it is unconscious. I want to just exist in a place where I am involved with people that understand me, and I don’t spend a lot of my time over-analyzing actions, words, or the lack of either. I don’t think that it is paranoia, because I am definitely experiencing it; but I do think that it could be that I expect too much sometimes.

I’m just going to put on my headphones, listen to some music, and try to forget myself for a little while. I am clearly thinking too much this morning. To top it all off, Sydney isn’t feeling well, and we had to take him into the vet yesterday for an IV and some tests. After they brought him out, I was holding him, and he just pissed all over me; without warning. Poor little guy. I just hope that he is feeling better soon… I know that my wallet would be happier as well.

get over it!, hmm interesting, is it just me?, listen up!, mixed media, movie musings, tragic, venting, well?, wtf?!

a boring tuesday

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Today has been painfully boring; meetings and not much else.

I still find it incredibly strange that people still deny that our involvement in the process of globalization has, in some ways, affected the situation we find ourselves dealing with in the middle east. If you cannot holistically grasp the concept that America is not all bread and butter, and in the many years that we have been stomping around carrying our big stick, that we have smashed a few houses, and gotten pretty dirty in our quest for wealth, then there is no need to argue with you anymore, because you will never understand the truly holistic nature of the situation. I suggest, for people that find themselves in this place (lacking the ability to wrap your brain around the FACT that America is partly to blame for the fact that we are so hated by so many in the world) take a few courses in anthropological theory, applied anthropological methods, and read up on the epistemological backbone of cultural anthropology. It may change your world (hopefully). If not, continuing to believe that you are right (that there is only one, or two reasons that we are hated and are being threatened), then there is no need to continue to bring that argument here; I got it. Move on. I am going to continue to share my opinions in a rational, holistic, and thoughtful manner, and this is obviously not something that you will be able to understand, comprehend, or agree with. Strange? Yes. Have to continue listen to it? No. Feel free to state your opinions if you wish, but realize, that just because I don’t buy into A+B=C, realizing that there is also a D, an E, a W, and a Y (not to mention potential others) that contributes to the answer, it doesn’t make my ideas radical or incoherent; it shows that I have the ability, and frankly the duty, to think about things holistically, searching for the entire meaning before I act on what I believe to be the cause of a problem.

Other than that, I have been entering in my DVDs on this website called DVDSpot, which I heard about from Brian. This is pretty cool, because it is another way I can organize and keep track of my growing collection, which shows statistics, and is downloadable. It is also pretty cool that the website lets you put in reviews (slowly… I know I know), and even estimates your collection’s value. Neat stuff. All free too! Thanks for the heads up Brian! When everything is entered, I am sure that I will add a handy dandy link over in the links section, so stay tuned!