Author: duane

five song friday, listen up!, mixed media, music musings, music suggestion

5SF: february 15

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I was actually scratching my head and wondering most of this week about what I was going to pick for my five songs this week, as I haven’t really been blown away by any of the stuff I have been checking out lately (new or otherwise). Maybe I am just in a lull? Who knows… however, it has allowed me to reexamine some stuff that I really love, and I figured it would be fun to post a few of those songs today. I am sure that there is a chance that it might be the first time someone is hearing it, or it may re-awaken interest in something you haven’t listened to in forever; either way, it’s all about the music. Since I have been in such a rut lately with finding new, great stuff, PLEASE send me your recommendations, okay? Now, on with the show!

Note: No videos this week, so feed readers, come by and listen up!

The Postal Service – Brand New Colony
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_215_postalservice-brandnewcolony.mp3]
One of my favorite records, Give Up by the Postal Service, drifted back into my focus recently, and I have been enjoying reexamining this fantastic album. I really hope that Ben Gibbard gets around to doing a follow up record at some point, because I would love to have some new Postal Service material. I love the whole album, but this is one of the songs that I tend to listen to over and over from the record; such great lyrics (a couple of which can be found in my header from time to time).

Hellogoodbye – All Time Lows
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_215_hellogoodbye-alltimelows.mp3]
After the aforementioned disappointment that I have been having trying to find new stuff to check out, I also stumbled on Hellogoodbye again, which is one of those rare CDs that I loved instantly from beginning to end. I absolutely adore their electro-pop-rock sound, and after I saw them live, I became a permanent fan. These guys are awesome, and they totally rock that whole “nerdy-cool” vibe, which fits them, and makes me swoon like the other little girls at the concert were. If you like this song, I highly recommend the whole album; I am looking forward to more from these guys. Hearing this again is definitely a great reminder of some of the great stuff in my massive music collection.

RyanDan – The Face
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_215_ryandan-theface.mp3]
Not only are these two identical twin brothers totally gorgeous, but they have this amazing harmony and quality to their singing. While most of their record is watered down with cheesy covers, the two opening songs are fantastic. The Face, which is one of those two openers, is my favorite song of theirs, and is one that I find myself listening to often. It is a totally beautiful song. Sometimes a cheesy ballad is EXACTLY what I need.

Lumidee – She’s Like The Wind
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_215_lumidee-sheslikethewind.mp3]
True story: recently, I was riding in my car to get some lunch, and randomly, She’s Like the Wind (the Patrick Swayze version) popped into my head. I had to turn off the radio and sing the whole song… cheesy, right? Well, I actually kind of love that song, and found out that it had been remade into kind of a great little hip hop number last summer. I have to say, that I kind of like this remake, the sample fits really well with the hip hop beat.

Sugababes – I Bet That You Look Good On The Dancefloor
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_215_sugababes-ibetthatyoulookgood.mp3]
A long while back, my good buddy Stu was giving me a “crash course” in order to bring me up to speed with the Sugababes (who I hadn’t really heard much from at that time), and this cover of the Arctic Monkey’s song of the same name was one of the songs he exposed me to. Not only does it tower over the original version, but it truly highlights what one should do when attempting to cover a song; fucking blow it out of water. See, I don’t mind when you cover a song, and actually cover it really well. In this case, the cover is far better than the original.

Now are you beginning to see just how varied my music tastes are, right? I like a little bit of everything! As always, I hope you enjoyed the songs, and I hope even more that you have some feedback/suggestions yourself! Have a great THREE DAY weekend everyone!

"pointless", all about me, funnies, that is so gay, the catch-all-egory, tragic

fixing our wireless, and will someone please smack this ass?!

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This past weekend, me and several friends ventured out to a new (as in, we had never been there new) bar called BJ Roosters for a friend’s birthday. He said that they normally had go-go dancers on Saturday night, but as it turns out, they had them on Friday night as well. While the whole “half naked dancing men on a bar” thing does nothing but make me a little uncomfortable, I looked at the situation as an adventure, and as such, proceeded to drink enough so as not to worry too much about it.

We settled in one of the little rooms, and not 2 minutes after we had taken our seats, one of the many strippers came into our room to “see what we were up to”. As he entered, wearing nothing but underwear, he asked enthusiastically, “what are you guys talking about in here?” as he jumped up on the table that sat between the two facing couches that we occupied. I told him that we were just talking about random stuff, and then he pulled out his dick, and asked me if we wanted to talk about that. Well, I never. I told him that he was more than welcome to talk about it, but I would pass, as I didn’t see a need to talk about his penis, being that it was his and all. Unsatisfied with my answer, he sought further approval from my other friends. After we all gave a pretty clear “we are not interested” series of responses, he felt the need to “get something” out of the encounter, and proceeded to bend over, pull down his underwear, and requested that I smack his ass. In fact, he said “smack it!” very forcefully at me. I politely declined, and then he turned to my friend Chris, and insisted that he “slap that ass!”. Chris also declined, which prompted him to ask, “damn, isn’t anyone gonna smack this ass?”, to which my friend Rich responded, “I will!”, and slapped the hell out of him. He seemed satisfied, so he pulled up the underwear and left us alone for the rest of the night.

It was definitely an interesting place. There was once “dancer” in particular who we watched intently; not because he was cute or good, but because he was so tweaked out of his mind that he was barely able to stand on the bar, let alone “dance”. It was a funny, but kind of sad sight to behold. Needless to say, he was the entertainment we enjoyed the most all evening.

The one saving grace of that place, was the amazingly hot bartender who totally gave me a “gay discount”. He looked a lot like Shayne Ward, and I was swooning over him all night. After seeing my tab, it appears I wasn’t the only one looking… or maybe he just mis-charged me… Either way, the boy was HOT.

Switching to a completely different topic, we finally got our wireless network back up and running last night, after James decided to reset everything on Monday without consulting me. He wiped out every setting, meaning that I had to re-set up everything; which wouldn’t have been a problem, if I knew all the settings I had put on it in the first place. On top of it all, after I set it up, the Xbox wouldn’t recognize the network no matter what I did. On a hunch, I suggested that we get a new router, and low and behold, the problem has been solved. Hooray for working technology; boo to partners that don’t consult you before messing something up that they themselves cannot fix. Oh well… all’s well that ends well, right?

is it just me?, listen up!, mixed media, music musings, well?, wtf?!

for some, believing clearly isn’t enough…

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Let me start this post by saying that I generally love the UK’s X-factor; after all, they gave me one of the loves of my life, Mr. Shayne Ward. Not only that, they followed him with the amazing Leona Lewis, who’s Bleeding Love is a song that I still have in heavy rotation; months after I initially heard it. However, with all that good, there too can come some bad. Even though I heard that this year’s winner Leon Jackson was to cover When You Believe, the amazing song from the Prince of Egypt that was originally sung by none other than the divas Mariah and Whitney, I had somehow avoided hearing his version, that is, until recently. It came on U-Pop the other day, and I listened, in order to hear the magnificence that the UK had chosen to win X-Factor. Instead of being impressed, I was horrified.

Not only does he clearly lack the same level of talent that Shayne and Leona possess, but his singing voice doesn’t even seem to be at a level higher than amateur. Not to be mean to the poor kid, but seriously, this is just a bad cover of an otherwise great song.

This brings me to my other gripe: Whomever chose When You Believe as the song that the winner would sing is either a sadist, or just an asshole; because if you are going to do a song that Mariah and Whitney did beautifully, the only way to do it successfully, is to do it better (which that, in and of itself, would be a difficult task indeed). Even without the powerhouse divas singing the original, what on earth were they thinking handing this enormous song to an “undiscovered talent”? Wow. To me, this is just a recipe for disaster, and makes a situation that only sheer luck could bail them out of. Unfortunately, the likable, and in my opinion, much more talented brother-sister group Same Difference did NOT win X-Factor, so we cannot know whether or not their version of the song would be superior to Leon’s; but one thing I do know, is that his version is almost un-listenable. But don’t just take my word for it, see (or rather, hear) for yourself.

First, I give you the Mariah and Whitney version; which is in my opinion, a flawless pop song. It is well written, and their voices compliment each other beautifully. Also, need I even mention that it is fucking Mariah and Whitney, which again, begs to question why one would ever try to cover something that big, unless they KNOW for certain they can do it better?


Now, check out Leon’s version of When You Believe (sorry, but the real video can’t be embedded). I can’t believe they went there, to be honest. I guess it is a little like Leona’s version of A Moment Like This (which is quite terrible as well, but she has managed to distance herself from it quite well), if you have heard a superior version of the song several years in advance of some practical nobody doing a sub-par version of it, what is the fucking point of them doing it at all? There are TONS of songs out there he could have covered; so why this one?


Oh well, we can never know what prompts these producers to rehash the same pop trinkets on other shores, but I can hope that future incarnations of shows like X-Factor, and even the dwindling American Idol, can manage to pull out some better songs, suited for the potential winners. If they are going to stick with sending these poor singers out there with rehashed, sub-par covers, can they at least pick some songs that they would be better suited for? Clearly, in this case, that did not happen at all. I just don’t think that we should have more tragedies like this one, littering the airwaves, and making my ears cringe when I hear them. Clearly, believing that you can sing the song better does not mean that you actually can. Poor Leon…

listen up!, mixed media, near and dear, public health, sex (oh yeah), show the love, that is so gay

octopus: a MUST see

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Yesterday, James and I went to a matinée showing of Steve Yockey’s amazing play, Octopus. I have been very eager to see the show, especially since Steve had sent me the script last year, and when I read it, I was completely moved by it. When he told me it was going to be put on at Actor’s Express, I was delighted for him, and anxious to see it brought to life.

The play deals with issues and consequences that can come from “having a little fun”, and not paying attention to the great monster that is waiting at the bottom of the sea. Octopus expertly uses an interestingly playful, as well as frightful, metaphor in order to tackle intense issues surrounding relationships, and what happens when things suddenly change; even when you promised each other that they wouldn’t.

The show was moving, poignant, gripping, and at times, even laugh out loud funny. I could really feel what the actors were saying, and really identified with many of the main characters. Being gay, and in a relationship myself, it is hard to think about what would happen if something unexpected, and horrible, were to suddenly thrust itself between us. Would we react in the way that those characters did? Hopefully, I will never have to answer that question myself.

Now, I know that I am being cryptic, but honestly, I don’t want to give away the very thing that the play seeks to show you; the message is strong, and really does hit close to home.

It succeeds on every level; it is entertaining, and it really engages you and forces you to think about the consequences of your actions. Just because you get lost in the moment during a random sexual encounter, doesn’t mean that there won’t be massive ramifications to both you and your partner. Steve uses the unseen “monster” to truly hammer home the point that a lack of attention to the truth of consequence is really missing for many young (and old) gay men in today’s dangerous world. He makes a strong statement about how denial and ignorance only make you defenseless in preventing the beast from devouring you, or someone that you love. He goes further to challenge you into seeing that consequences are often not very easy to deal with for either partner, and sometimes, those reactions are devastating in and of themselves. It was masterfully written, and the stage direction and effects are phenomenal.

You must see Octopus. It will move you, and it may even make you want to cry, but it reminds us to be mindful of our actions, and know that there are consequences to everything that we do and say; especially within the concept of a relationship. Being mindful is the key to preventing that monster from devouring us all.

Octopus is playing NOW at Actor’s Express, and on through February 23. Don’t miss it!!!

five song friday, listen up!, mixed media, movie musings, music musings, music suggestion

5SF: february 8

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It’s finally Friday, and it’s time for some tunes, right? This week, we have 4 tracks from female singers, and I realize that I seem to prefer female vocalists over anything else, for whatever reason. Also, at least a couple of these tracks are “rare” tracks that are either internet finds, or bonus tracks from international editions of that artist’s CD. Also, this week, we will have two flashback tracks, one from a sort of recent favorite film of mine, and one from a lot further back, so sit tight, and let’s get this party started.

Sara Bareilles – Any Way the Wind Blows
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_208_sarabareilles-anywaythewindblows.mp3]
First up today is the amazing and beautiful Sara Bareilles, who readers of this blog know that I totally adore. I have been having such a great time watching her get loads of deserved attention these past couple of months, and have been playing close attention myself to iTunes and the blogs, as they keep offering up new live material for me to devour. The song was apparently a bonus track on an Asian release of Little Voice, and I am so glad that I found it, because like the rest of the record, it is fantastic. I bought tickets to see Sara in March earlier this week, so I felt it fitting to show some more love for the fabulous Ms Bareilles in this week’s five song Friday. Seriously, it is hard not to feature her every week; she is certainly one of my favorite artists.

Sia – The Girl
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_208_sia-thegirl.mp3]
It seems that people are foaming at the mouth of Sia lately; you can’t walk into a Starbucks without seeing her new CD on display. Also, I have heard that song Day Too Soon all over XM, and quite enjoy her myself. However, I think that this is by far my favorite song from the record, which I like, but just can’t get that into for whatever reason. Also, I can’t help but think of the amazing Nicole Atkins when I hear Sia, because their voices have a very similar quality to them. I am definitely glad to see an out singer getting some attention here in the states, and it seems that there is no end to the great music coming from down under. This is such a fun track, and I just love the blaring horns, don’t you?!

Lily Allen – Mr Blue Sky
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_208_lilyallen-mrbluesky.mp3]
Oh Lily! I have adored Lily Allen for quite a while now, and highly regret not hearing her CD before the end of 2006, because it would have surely made my best of 2006 list; it is fantastic. I saw her in concert early last year, and I feel like that was what really got me to fall head over heels with Lily. She is fantastic. When I saw this song offered on one of my regularly read mp3 blogs, I jumped at it, and as it turns out, I fucking LOVE it. I hope that this is a taste of what she will be bringing on her next CD; which I hope she will get out sometime in the near future (I know she is working on a show, but I hope that she has time to record as well). I have said it, but I’ll say it again, I totally adore Lily, and this is a great song to add to her already impressive arsenal of songs in my music collection.

Heart – Crazy On You
[audio:http://www.duanemoody.com/audio/fsf_208_heart-crazyonyou.mp3]
First off, is there anything better than that opening guitar sequence? Um… yeah, amazing. I picked Guitar Hero back up this week after a little hiatus, and I am glad that I did, I have been having fun with it all week. I have also been listening to some of my favorite songs from the games (I have 4 in all), and one of my favorites by far is Crazy on You by the AMAZING Heart. Seriously this song is fucking ROCK. I can listen to it on repeat, and it strengthens that part of me that wants to rock out in a band someday. If only I could be 1/10 the badass that Ann Wilson is. Damn. Love this song!

Hedwig and the Angry Inch – Origin Of Love
Finally today, is the amazingly well written Origin of Love from one of my favorite movies of all time, Hedwig and the Angry Inch. I randomly put on the soundtrack earlier in the week, and ended up watching the movie again last night for the first time in ages. I was reminded by how amazing this movie is, and how much I love the music from it. It is such a great movie, and the songs are just fantastic. Even if you aren’t a fan of musicals, I think that anyone would love Hedwig. I had the chance to see it performed a while back, and that made me officially a fanatic of the lady with the feathered bangs. Seriously, what’s not to love? This song is just fucking beautiful; as are many others in the film. NOTE: A word of caution about this video, it is pulled from the movie, and at the VERY beginning, there is some shouting from Hedwig’s mom, so turn down the speaker for a second or two. Also, there is a little cartoon-udity, which I don’t really think is offensive, but if that isn’t your thing, just heads up.

Well, there you go; my five songs for friday. I hope that everyone is having a great afternoon, and as always, let me know what you are jamming to… share and share alike I always say! Have a great weekend!

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just like on tv

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I have been sitting here this morning, looking through some of the journals and blogs that I regularly follow, and spending time looking through many of those same people’s flickr collections, and I feel like I am watching my favorite program on television. I feel like I am seeing their interesting lives, and I find myself always wanting to know more.

A few of these people have a captivating quality to them, that I would say equates to me having “crushes” on them. It is like your favorite actor/actress that you would totally get with if you had the chance; only it isn’t as palpable as that. It is much more innocent and vague, poignantly less sexual, and often times, more interest driven. Handsome and attractive? Yes, they are, but that is not all that I like about them… there is so much more going on, and a lot of it, I don’t even know about; which is part of the thrill.

They are strangers, they are people that exist inside this little box that I look at day in and day out, and I don’t really know them at all. All I know is what I have seen, that which they choose to share, and I eagerly await new content and evidence that my favorite characters are doing well, and having a great life. I benefit from seeing that they have posted new pictures, or have uploaded new content; I want to know them, even though I really can’t on any level other than “through the internet”. Maybe someday? Who knows, but right now, this is fulfilling enough.

I often wonder, that if I have this type of relationship with the characters that I follow, does anyone follow me? If so, what is it about me that makes them keep coming back for more? Is it what draws me to them, the attraction, the interest, a fascination, and a captivation with life and how it is sometimes so different than my own?

Perhaps it is the anthropologist in me that I constantly seeking more and more, and who enjoys, and is so fulfilled by watching the world around him. More intensely, in this case, watching those in that little box that sits on my desktop, finding pictures, words, instances, and little bits of evidence to suggest that my favorite characters are doing well, and are keeping me company in the little way that they don’t even know that they are. Yes, it truly is intriguing to me what you have to say, and every time you post some pictures, I look forward to seeing how you are doing. I enjoy our time together, and look forward to more.

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flashback to pop greatness

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So I missed the Superbowl last night because I was caught up in a 7 hour study session for my Anatomy test (yikes!), but I did manage to catch a recap of the FANTASTIC performance Paula Abdul gave before the show via youtube (thanks to discopop for the heads up):


Let me just say this now, THIS performance is how you bring a fucking comeback. Paula has been out of the music scene for over 10 years, and here she is, tearing it up again. Whether or not you were a fan of Paula back in the day, there is no denying that she had a bevy of hits in her hay day, and it is safe to say, that this new song should be a hit for her as well. The song is catchy, and perfect for her. As she says at the end of the video, and I couldn’t agree with her more, the timing definitely was right.

Congratulations, Ms. Abdul, great show. Truth be told, I always knew she had it in her; I love me some Paula Abdul, and I always have. The first CD I ever bought was Paula Abdul: Shut Up and Dance! The Remixes. Embarrassing? Maybe… but there’s no denying that in her prime, the lady definitely had a knack for pop. I am just glad that her comeback single is such a good one. I wonder where she will go with this… a full album? Who knows… all I know, is that if Randy Jackson had this up his sleeve, I hope that she stays with him for the duration. Paula, you are definitely, forever my girl.

five song friday, listen up!, mixed media, music musings, music suggestion

5SF: february 1

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Welcome to this week’s installment of the five song Friday, everyone! Today is going to feature songs you may be familiar with, songs that you may have heard a while ago and forgotten about, a song that you may hate (as I did when I first heard it), and maybe some songs that you are hearing for the first time. So let’s get to it, shall we?

Yael Naim – New Soul
First up today is a song that is as catchy as hell, from those new Mac Air ads by Paris-born/Israeli-raised singer Yael Naim. The main reason I wanted to feature this song, is because there are many of us that have tivos and DVRs out there that never get the chance to watch commercials, and as such, may miss great songs like this one. Personally, this song was recommended by one of you (my wonderful readers!), who told me that I might like it; and you know what, he was right! I do (thanks for the suggestion, see, I told you I want to know what you are listening to!)! Another reason for posting this one, is because the video is just awesome, and I totally love it. Such a catchy song, and a great video, paired with an Apple endorsement? Yael is going places, people! Who’d of thought before Feist, that we would be looking to Apple for new, great music? Well, now we know that they are onto something!

Candie Payne – One More Chance
In this current era of music, the throwback sound seems to be the “next biggest thing”, with artist after artist streaming that sound of old, and making it new. Such is the case with Ms Candie Payne, who uses those old influences, and Mark Ronson beats, to churn out this fabulous song. I have certainly been enjoying this reemergence of the “throwback sound”, and the more artists that jump on this band wagon that are doing it as well as Candie are, the happier I am destined to be. Also, take note that her look is very “That Girl”-ish, adding to the hip, vintage feel… it’s a great song, and great video.

Linda Kiraly – Can’t Let Go
I was trying to decide between this one and another song for this week, and I watched this video again, and it struck me much harder than it ever has before. This song is fantastic. Linda has a beautiful and powerful voice, and the beat makes for a perfect pop song. The beginning is a little slow (perhaps the reason that I wasn’t hit as hard the first time I heard it), but at 40 seconds into the video when she stomps on those drums, you get to see why you came out to the show. This is her first single from an upcoming album, and I cannot wait to see what else she has up her sleeve. My buddy Stu always has these random acts up his sleeve, and I just love it when he let’s me in on the goods; especially when they are as good as this!

Patrick Wolf – Accident and Emergency
Now, for the ultra-queer Patrick Wolf, who I totally flash on the beginnings of Ziggy Stardust, and queer glam rock when I see him. I will admit this openly, I HATED this song when I first heard it. I don’t know what it was about it, but it was just a huge turn off for me. However, it got into my head, and I gave it another go, and after a few listens, I really like it. The other day when I was waiting for jury duty, I ended up listening to his record, and I really liked a lot of it, whereas previously, I was wondering why so many people were into him. Was he to be another Roisin Murphy for me, I thought? Well looking now, I figure, perhaps not… I am glad that I gave it another go, because it is quite the catchy little hit. I highly recommend you give this more that one listen; it took me several to get into it, but now I quite like it.

The Darkness – I Believe In a Thing Called Love
Last, but certainly not least, is my “blast from the past” track for this week. I have to say, that I still remember the first time I heard this song; it was 3 in the morning, and my tivo started randomly taping an MTV video show (shock and awe! They were showing videos!), and the video for this song came on. I sat there, mesmerized, and completely freaked out at the same time. What the fuck? I thought. After it was over, I rewinded it, and ended up watching it 5 times. I was hooked. I haven’t listened to the Darkness in a while (their debut CD is quite fantastic), and this song came on XM the other day, and I ran home and put it back on my ipod (it was lost when iTunes decided to delete all my playlists a while back). Well, I am glad that I was reacquainted with the fabulousity that is the Darkness… their queer glam metal is pure music gold. I am such a closet metal lover, and this shit is just the type of thing that blows my skirt way up over my head. This is metal that doesn’t take itself too seriously, and in fact, makes fun of itself all at the same time. If only it were on one of the Guitar Heroes… perhaps maybe a future installment will include this gem! I certainly hope so, because this song is fantastic.

Well, there she is, this week’s 5SF is on the books. I hope that everyone found something that they could enjoy. As always, let me know what you are into, it may make a future list! Have a great afternoon, kids!

all about me, hotness, listen up!, mixed media, pegg and frost, show the love

loving British telly and an account of my finger accident

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First of all, my Grandma is feeling much better, and is out of the hospital; seems it was a bad reaction to some bad medication. I am just happy that she is doing much better.

I spoke earlier about the new season of Torchwood starting up, and how excited I was about it, since the show is fantastic. However, I didn’t mention the fact that I was going to give Doctor Who a go as well; especially since Torchwood is a spin-off of that series. I was curious as to the beginning of Jack Harkness (the leader of Torchwood), and found out that he got his start in the first series of the revival of Doctor Who. Well, I downloaded all of the new series, and I just finished series one yesterday, and I have to say that I have become ENTHRALLED with the realm of Dr Who. This show is amazing, funny, fantastically written, and engaging. The story is full of fantastic intricacies and sci-fi goodness that totally makes my inner nerd jump with glee. I don’t know what took me so long to get into it! I can’t stop thinking about it, and find that my hunger for British telly growing stronger and stronger with each show I get into to.

As I mentioned, I just finished series one, with Christopher Eccleston as the Doctor, and it was purely brilliant. I loved every episode, and found myself a little upset when it was over. I can’t wait to get into series two, because I have heard that many like David Tennant as the Doctor better than the previous Doctor. Either way, I love this show, and I am so glad that I finally got into it. It is awesome too, because I can watch the episodes that I downloaded to my PC through the Xbox 360; which is pretty awesome in my opinion. Technology rules!

I also watched the last few episodes of the British comedy Hyperdrive last night, which is another British show that I have been watching after I ordered the DVDs a while back (mostly because it stars Nick Frost). I also had a great time with that show, and I think that it has made me really pay way more attention to what is going on at the BBC. I am going to regularly check out British shows, in hopes that I can find more shows that I enjoy as much as I have enjoyed these. Perhaps when I finish the Doctor Who series, I will give Spaced another watch; I have seen it twice now, and that show is just brilliant (and fucking hilarious) as well. Such good shows that hardly get any attention over here… strange. Perhaps something great has come from the writer’s strike; we get to see what great telly the Brits have to offer us!

Switching the topic completely, I had a minor accident last night, one that I swear I haven’t had since I was in middle school; I was getting out of the car, and I slammed the door on my finger!!! The worst, was that James had locked the doors before I got out, and I couldn’t re-open the door! I was just screaming into the phone (I was talking to Grandma), and freaking out. Luckily, my finger turned just the right way, and I didn’t break it. It is swollen today, but all in all, it is quite funny, since I seriously haven’t done that in ages. Silly, accident prone me.

all about me, near and dear, tragic, venting, well?, wtf?!

“family” woe and health concerns

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Yesterday I got a call that NO ONE wants to get: my Grandma is in the hospital. I had spoken to her earlier in the week, and knew that she was having some adverse reactions to a new blood pressure medication, but I didn’t realize it was bad enough for her to need emergency transport and a hospital stay. I just talked with her, and she is feeling really good (other than having to deal with freezing hospital temperatures, and long wait times), and apparently, all of her tests are coming back normal. Whew. That makes me feel good to know that she is doing well, and it is probably that medication, as we were talking about the other day. Now, she can get a new medication (and a new doctor, IMHO), and hopefully, get back to feeling right as rain soon.

UPDATE: I just got the news that she is about to go home. YAY! I just hope that she is feeling good ASAP.

As I desperately tried to get in touch with someone who would have information after my cousin called me with that news last night (who totally came through for me, and has always been there amazingly… thanks cuz!), I was troubled that I hadn’t heard anything, and couldn’t get any information from the hospital as to her condition. After several phone calls, I finally got to talk with my Grandma around 9:30, only to find out that she was at the hospital by herself.

As of this moment, I haven’t heard a single word from either of my parents. What the fuck? As those of you that have read this blog may know, I clearly have family woes when it comes to my parents, but this just reinforces something frighteningly clear to me: the distance between us is not only geographical, and it doesn’t only apply to me. I was so angry when I talked with my Grandma, and found out that my sister’s husband was one of the people that came in the ambulance that brought my Grandma to the hospital. I was angry, because that means that not only do my parents have to know that she is in the hospital, that they neither saw it important enough to check in on her, nor alert me to her being there in the first place… and they wonder why I am “so distant”.

Care or don’t care, that is up to you, but it is glaringly clear to me what is truly important in the minds of some of my family members, and it truly makes me sad. I also wish that whole “why don’t you ever visit” mind game would stop; you KNOW why. I wish things could be different, but apparently, they are not going to get any better, and I have to deal with that. I have to deal with it, because they aren’t going to. I just hope my Grandma knows that I care, and that I am here for her; she is one of the only people that has consistently been there for me in return, and in my “family”, that is a very, very rare thing.