Author: duane

well?

“Making friends as an adult is a lot like dating. Don’t you think?”

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That is the last line from the comments on this post, where I was pondering the dynamic of friends and friendships; both in development and maintenance of individual and group friendships. I said that I would come back to this topic, and I didn’t realize it had been so long since I wrote the original post; so I hope that you’re able to keep going with me…

The reason I chose Karen’s statement, is because that is exactly how I feel. A lot of other people identified that they were in close friend groups, a lot of people said they didn’t have any friends, pretty much the whole gamut was expressed, much as I expected. But, what I didn’t expect, is that most people didn’t identify why they held on to these friends, and why those friend groups still thrived. I think that Karen’s statement of comparing gaining and keeping friends as an adult to dating is spot on; it takes work on both of your part to find out whether you are compatible, and eventually, you have to start calling each other back. I find that is why I think many of my friend groups have drifted apart, a little bit of drift came from a lot of not calling people back, and it spiralled out of control. Simple as that. And the weird thing is, it is never just one person, it is a combination of everyone doing it at different times.

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funnies

(insert masculine grunts here)

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Looking back: Anniversary (2 years and 6 months, ya’ll) “surprises” = excuse to buy, and install, double towel bar that we have been needing forever.

Tools required for installation:
1 insanely powerful drill that can rip off hand if you hold on to the thing that secures the bit too long.
1 double towel bar from Target, simple, and yet understated.
1 orange level, because I love orange, and it does need to be level or I will be tempted to rip it out of the wall every time I walk in the bathroom.
3 drill bits; because the first and second tries at making the toggle bolts go in were not successful.
four 6 toggle bolts; yes, I use them, because they are stronger than the crappy dry wall screws that came in the pack. Yes, you have to drill a pretty big hole in the wall just to use them. Yes, there are two that are inside the wall now. And yes, I hang everything in the house with them, because those damn dry wall anchors couldn’t hold a sock to the wall.
1 hour of frustration, cursing, moving it over another inch even though I used the pack in came in as a template, moving it over another centimeter (even though I used the pack it came in as a template); and drinking during and after the midpoint of the beginning to attempt “simply installing a towel bar”.

Result:
Towels. Are. Dry. (and not draped over the door or the shower bar).

It. Was. Worth it.

Unrelated link (but related to yesterday): I guess I’m fucked, huh?

near and dear

poopie day = a poem.

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Sometimes, we just have poopie days; nothing is wrong, I just find myself anxious and whatever again… pay no mind. I wrote a poem though!

Bound by burdens,
Bored by boundaries,
I worry about floors and things.
I worry about lives and rings,
I worry too much.
All I see is new to me,
Unreal to me,
Too far from me.
All I feel is sinking appeal
To a thoughtless, heartless beast.
Burdened and beaten day after day,
I try and search for a different way,
But my own worry holds me,
I am chained to always remain,
In my cycle of indecisiveness.
Blinded by blackness
Burdened by boredom,
I halfheartedly search for truth
I make small tears and split fine hairs,
And convince myself I’ll find it.
Still unsure of a lot of things,
Anxious about what futures bring,
I lose sight of the mundane,
I can’t feel the air that’s everywhere,
And I constantly feel without.
A burden to bear
Is my life where,
I fruitlessly bumble about.
It’s sadder than sad,
And it makes me mad,
That I can’t, don’t, or won’t pull out
But the fact is,
That right now,
I honestly just don’t know how.

Alright, I know, I know, that sounds a little depressing, but seriously, writing poems is cathartic… don’t we all feel better? Anyways… hope everyone else is having a kick ass Tuesday.

mixed media

maybe, not winning was a good thing!

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Usually, every year, the winner of the Best Picture Oscar always takes FOREVER to come out on DVD; something about capitalizing on the fame the Oscar brings at the box office. So, naturally, when Brokeback lost, a little bit of me was all, “sweet! now they HAVE to release it soon!”. And, today, I just randomly came across this, which says that it will be released on DVD April 4th! That is just a few weeks away! I certainly hope this is true, because that is like the fastest theater to DVD release I have seen in a while; and good for me, because now I will be able to watch it again (and again)! If there is anything that Annie Proulx can breathe easier about (since her panties have been in an uproar lately), it is that she can buy the DVD and enjoy her story on April 4th! I know that I will be at the store on that day, DVD in hand, ready to buy… I wonder if they will have a collector’s edition; I normally don’t care about that crap, I just want the movie, but in this case, I may have to spring the extra dollars for more features with Jake!

Now, I really want that new TV… that’s how I’ll spin it; “James, we NEED the new TV to watch Brokeback!!” Yes… it’s all coming together now…

blog on blog

trying something new…

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I always check flickr like 10 times a day; even when I haven’t uploaded anything new, and I wonder why. I guess I just want to be up in the know about what is going on, who’s updated, who’s commenting, etc. I know that I don’t upload as much as I want, and I want to be able to have super powers of photo-editing, but I don’t, which is what prevents me from uploading new pictures every day (even though I have tons just waiting… I know, I know). So, in an effort to both remedy this situation of adding new fun things to my flickr page, AND to finally start realizing and utilizing the full potential (well, at least some of that potential) my snazzy cell phone possesses, I am going to start a new thing! I am going to start taking pictures with my cell phone at random times and places, and send it to flickr; which will give you even more of an idea of where I am, and what I am doing!! (thus upping the big brother component of my life) I think that it will be a fun way for me to share all of those silly little mundane things that I go through each day that aren’t “important enough” to make the blog! Think of it as a supplement to the blog; in pictures!

I know that I am a super dork for being excited about this, but I honestly really am… I think that it is going to be fun. I have already gotten started, so check out the photos I have taken; and stay tuned… more pictures to come!

show the love

I feel bad about it, I really do!

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Lately, I feel like a bad blogger; I haven’t been reading and commenting on other blogs as much, mainly because I have been super distracted. It has nothing to do with the bloggers themselves, or their blogs, and I wanted to post this so that all of you out there know what is going on; I feel bad about it! Hopefully, I will be able to shake this distraction, and go back to enjoying all of your wonderful blogs, so keep your eye out for me; I haven’t forgotten about you, and I wanted you to know that.

I do miss you all, and I feel bad… Let this be an apology or message of atonement; whatever you need… I promise I’ll stop by soon. Thanks for sticking with me, and know that I am still with you… promise.

show the love

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!

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Is this a real holiday? I googled it, and here’s what I found: (from st-patricks-day.com

Saint Patrick’s Day has come to be associated with everything Irish: anything green and gold, shamrocks and luck. Most importantly, to those who celebrate its intended meaning, St. Patrick’s Day is a traditional day for spiritual renewal and offering prayers for missionaries worldwide.
So, why is it celebrated on March 17th? One theory is that that is the day that St. Patrick died.

So, basically, people get shit faced on green beer to celebrate the death of the guy that brought Christianity to Ireland? Sweet! It’s like the world’s way of pouring a 40 on the pavement for old Saint Patrick! What what! Now, that I know the significance, and to celebrate my Irish heritage (have you ever seen me eyes? but seriously… my family does have some Irish desent), I am going to go out tonight and drink several for old Saint Patrick; I may even do a few Irish car bombs… anyone in?

Oh, and I didn’t even wear green today; I forgot. I had plenty of time to think about it while I sat on the freeway at a dead stop though, 85N was closed on my way to work… people need to learn how to drive and NOT CRASH in this city. geez… Anyway…. I usually don’t care that much about stuff on my cat, but this was too appropriate and funny to pass up:

But Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!

[picture from stuffonmycat.com]

is it just me?

does this sound wrong to anyone else?

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Woman. Boy. Sex. Baby. Statutory Rape. Question: why is she only getting 9 months in jail and being forced to stay away from her husband (the minor), until he is 17? Why not more of a penalty? I understand that she has a baby, with a 15 year old boy, but seriously, why is there not more of a punishment in this case? I ask, because I know that statutory rape carries this sentence: “if the person so convicted is 21 years of age or older, such person shall be punished by imprisonment for not less than ten nor more than 20 years”, here in Georgia. Here is the portion of the House Bill that describes the stakes for a statutory rape conviction:

SECTION 7.
Said title is further amended by striking Code Section 16-6-3, relating to statutory rape, and inserting in lieu thereof the following:
“16-6-3.
(a) A person commits the offense of statutory rape when he or she engages in sexual intercourse with any person under the age of 16 years and not his or her spouse, provided that no conviction shall be had for this offense on the unsupported testimony of the victim.
(b) Except as provided in subsection (c) of this Code section, a A person convicted of the offense of statutory rape shall be punished by imprisonment for not less than one nor more than 20 years; provided, however, that if the person so convicted is 21 years of age or older, such person shall be punished by imprisonment for not less than ten nor more than 20 years; provided, further, that if. Any person convicted under this subsection of the offense of statutory rape shall, in addition, be subject to the sentencing and punishment provisions of Code Section 17-10-6.2.
(c) If the victim is 14 or 15 years of age and the person so convicted is no more than three years older than the victim, such person shall be guilty of a misdemeanor.”

I ask, because she committed, admitted to, and was convicted of statutory rape. So why is she escaping the punishment befitting the crime (a minimum of 10 years)? I am not trying to say that I believe men or women deserve preferential treatment, but, I know that if this were a man that had convicted this crime, he would be looking at 10-20 years in jail, right? Now, I am not naive, I know that there are different kinds of statutory rape; I don’t condone any of them, and I think that if you are convicted, it doesn’t matter if you are a man or a woman, you did the crime, you do the time. This woman is a sexual predator that manipulated her child’s friend (!), and she is basically getting off with a big slap on the wrist. She even gets to be with him when he turns 17! There is something seriously wrong with that! I guess that I am just wondering why there is not more of a penalty in this case (i.e., the minimum), especially because of the legislation that says that it should be? Wouldn’t that be a clear message to act as a deterrent to the future of this kind of crime? Wouldn’t it be better to punish someone for manipulating a minor and sexually abusing them; rather than just giving them a very reduced sentence, and just making them stay away until he is old enough?

Does anyone else agree or disagree? Why? I personally see sex crimes against children as the worst kind of crime, and I just don’t think that anyone should be able to carry such a lenient punishment for something so manipulative and harmful to the child. Yes, this boy was 15, but is he still considered a child? He is by every other standard, and she was even covicted of statutory rape! I guess I am just wondering this, because I see all sex offenses against minors (that’s 17 and under, right?) as deplorable and horrible crimes. I know that she will be registered as a sex offender, but, when he turns 17, they can be together. Does anyone else see something wrong with that? This child has obviously been deeply manipulated, and the state pretty much has said, “not right now, but soon” to the sex offender. I just don’t get it.

What do you all think? Seriously? Am I being too hard on the woman, or does she deserve what the law says?

[article, for reference]

james says

reason #674 why James is the cutest boyfriend ever:

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Almost every night, our ritual is the same; eat dinner, watch tv/movie, go to bed. Very little changes in that routine, unless, say, I have something to go to, or James has grad school work to complete. Regardless of what else may find its way into the ritual, it always ends the same; James asleep on the couch while I watch tv. Now that we have the new couch, I couldn’t be happier, I love spending time with him, and now, we are on the same piece of furniture, so that just makes the ritual that much more enjoyable.

Like clockwork, when the clock strikes 10:30 (sometimes he lasts til 11), James is either pretty much completely asleep and either snoring, grinding his teeth, or a lovely combination of the two. I usually have to jostle him awake a few times if the noises get too intense to hear the tv (which is easier now that we are on the same couch), but usually, it is cute to see him just laying over there grinding/snoring away, and rustling his feet back and forth; he’s a cute sleeper. But him being a cute sleeper isn’t reason #674, reason #674 has to do with what happens while he is sleeping, or really, what happens just after he has been woken up, in order to be taken to bed. James has this little thing he does, where he talks complete nonsense for a minute; sometimes, it is a little intense, but most times, it is just super-cute. Take last night for example.

Last night, we were watching a movie, and somehow he fell asleep sitting almost completely upright. The best thing about that, was that he wasn’t snoring or grinding his teeth (but he was still jostling his feet). I noticed it, because I didn’t have to constantly wake him up every time the noise got out of control, but being the loving man I am, I still felt the need to jostle him and make sure he was sleeping well. When I did, he launched full force into his “I just woke up silliness”.

Here’s how the *short* conversation went:
Me: “Hello!”
Him: “I am sorry, daddy.” (yes we call each other daddy… we do have a baby (Sydney) after all!)
Me: “What for baby?”
Him: “Snoring.”
Me: “You weren’t snoring, for once.”
Him: “I can’t help it, I have a disassociated sternum.”
Me: “Uh, don’t you mean a deviated septum?”
Him: “That too.” *falls back asleep*

See, that is reason #674 why James is the cutest boyfriend ever.

listen up!

get involved! email your senator to support censure!

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I always talk about being involved. This time, I am. I emailed my senators, you must do the same. There is no reason why a censure cannot be supported; this is an issue of criminal action, not an issue of politics. Go here to email your senator. Here’s what I sent to Chambliss and Isakson:

Senator Chambliss/Isakson,

I am writing you today as a concerned American citizen, asking you to please support and back Feingold in his request to censure president Bush. What the president has done is criminal, and at a minimum, his actions set a bad precedent, especially if no action is taken against someone who breaks the law. When he went against the law and avoided the safe guards in place, and proceeded in conducting illegal wiretapping, he violated the freedom of the American public, and did so under false pretenses; more importantly, he broke the law. Senator Chambliss/Isakson, I challenge you to look at what is important here; the president is not above the law, and should not be allowed to conduct himself in that manner. Please, support the censure, and show your constituents that you support our freedom and believe in justice. The president is not above the law, and he cannot continue to believe that he is. Thank you.

Sincerely,
Duane Moody

Let’s get involved!

UPDATE: I don’t know how many of you care (not many people have commented), but I did get a response from Senator Chambliss, and I sent him another reply. Since it is long, it is after the jump… so click the read more.

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