As you all know by now, I am a hacking, sneezing, non-breathing beast right now, thanks to nature’s big O; but I see fit to have a talk with you about a little something I feel the need to get off my chest. I have an addiction, and no matter how I try to avoid its seductive powers, I am powerless in the wake of its strong hold. Whenever I get sick, or have one of my 100’s of sinus infections each year, I start pumping in the drugs; Decongestants, Claritin, Benadryl, and just about anything else I can think of that will keep me from experiencing one more second of discomfort. I reach for the pills quickly, and carry around small amounts of them, medicating not as indicated, but as I feel the need to. But this is not my addiction, this is a normal reaction that most people have in the time of sickness. This is normal.
But my addiction is real, and it rears its ugly head in times of need such as this. When the several Sudafeds don’t instantly snap my nose and throat into shape, and open my completely blocked nasal passages, I get a little panicky. It is almost like a heroin addict picking at the skin; just one more fix, I need it, I know I do. I will die with out it. I can’t breathe for crying out loud; why not use? Why not just give in to my addiction, and breathe again? And so there I am, staring at myself in the mirror, the drugs in my hand, and shaking my head in disbelief, I take it in… at first it burns… but it is a good burn. It signals the beginning of at least 12 hours of sheer breathing bliss. Afrin, you have saved me yet again. You have set me free.
I. Can. Breathe.
But damn you if you don’t have a withdrawal as wicked as the aforementioned heroin. Several nights from now, when my infection clears up, and when I want to go back to a drug-free existence, you will still have your hold on me. You will not let me go so easily as you cleared my breathing passages. You will make me suffer to let you go. There are those that do not have the power to let you go, and with every fix, I fear I am becoming one of them. And the worst, is that with every spray of your sweet nectar, I know that withdrawal time will come… but it doesn’t stop me. Afrin, you are my addiction, and I know that I need you. But please, let me down gently this time, okay?
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