“What do you mash to mash it off??”

First, before I even get to what the post is about, I just want to say thanks to everyone that had kind words to say about my “blogsestential” crisis. We all go through those types of things sometimes, and it is nice to get that proverbial pat on the shoulder. Muwah!

Now, on with the show!

Recently someone told me that they read my blog and what I said about my trip to NC for Thanksmas, and they thought it was pretty funny. I told them that I undoubtedly left a lot of shit out, basically because I was so worn down when I got back, that it was best to just move forward. But, today, I was listening to my voicemails on my mobile, and I totally remembered what that “skipped message” I kept leaving in my inbox was all about. It was a call from my Grandma (who I totally love, but this is just too good not to share), inquiring where James and I were at; because we were supposed to be at her house like 10 minutes before she called. The message went something like this:

“Duane, it’s Grandma. It’s 5 past 7. What time are y’all coming, and let’s go on for supper. Let me know, bye!
And then… silence. For like a full minute. Followed by:

rustling

“What do you mash to mash it off?”
“Huh?”
“What do I mash?”
“It’s that little red button up there, dick.” (I know, my Grandma’s boyfriend calls her dick?)
“Where? What do I mash? They can hear exactly what I’m saying on this phone until it’s cut off.”
*end of message*

It became very apparent to me right away that she had used her boyfriend’s mobile phone to call, most likely because he has free long distance, and she didn’t want to bother with a calling card. All I want to know, is how using a mobile phone is so different than using a cordless phone (of which she has and uses every day). It is also important to mention that she always, even to this day, asks me if I am calling her on the “little phone” (which is how she refers to my mobile phone), and usually says something about how she is afraid to call my mobile, because she doesn’t know how to leave a message (even though she, herself has voicemail). Ah… aren’t old people so cute?!

Hump day songs:
Everything But the Girl – Flipside
Sarah McLachlan – Answer
Kanye West – Diamonds From Sierra Leone (Remix) featuring Jay-Z