US Senator Rick Santorum said recently that gay marriage threatens his and all marriages:
From the New York Times: “When I asked [Rick Santorum] if he viewed gay marriage as a threat to his own marriage, he answered quickly. ‘Yes, absolutely,’ he said. ‘It threatens my marriage. It threatens all marriages.'”
Well, really, my question here is… wait for it… HOW???
How does gay marriage threaten to dissolve the union between you and your wife, Rick? Is it because gay marriage is so powerful, that it has special powers like those of the Wonder Twins, which will allow gays to take on any form (like, I don’t know, say the form of a young Christian, hetero, engaged couple, fooling you into marrying them and thus throwing your whole system out of whack)? Is that it? Or, is it because ol’ Ricky is scared that he will be enticed by the seductive nature of homosexuality (because we all know homosexuality is so super seductive, is super cool, comes with no backlash whatsoever, and is something those who bathe in sin love to practice, note: insert sarcasm… ahem)??
To be quite honest, I think that someone is, well, crazy! If gay marriage had that much power, gays would be getting married outside of the US, where it is legal, and staying there, using that power at their will!!! Using it to dissolve crappy marriages that they see all around them, and possibly making some people happier! (Like those people’s parents who have been married for 20 years, but sleep in different parts of the house, and actually cannot even have a conversation because they hate each other so much (yeah, we all know those straight married people). Because, that is the gay marriage agenda; end all straight marriage!!! YOU NAILED IT! (Again, not that it is necessary, but: sarcasm!)
Hell, if that truly is the case, then I can see why you wouldn’t want to promote gay marriage. There would be a chance that it would make some of these crazy right-wingers happier through the sheer power of gay marriage; by influencing them to divorce! What? You say that gay marriage wouldn’t do that? Oh, and you also say that this is just another one of those (simply insane notions) that shouldn’t be given another thought? Oh, ok, this is simply another ploy to make gay marriage into the devil; or is it the other way around? Either way, buddy, gay marriage wouldn’t effect you in any way; I don’t know any hetero couples that flaunt their hetero married life in my face, unless I want them to. Even if they did, WHO CARES?
And just as a side note: Is it just me, or do you detect a feeling from people like this, that there could be resentment because “Homo 1” looked better in his wedding outfit than “Hetero 1”, and was a hell of a lot more photogenic? And, that “Homo 1” and “Homo 2’s” wedding was so fucking kick ass that it made “the Hetero” wedding look like Brit and K-Fed’s?? Probably that; and why don’t we throw in a little internalized homophobia for good measure.