BUT the devil is going to whip my ass into shape. I did Tae Bo in college, and lost 20 lbs. I just got the advanced DVD, and after about 15 minutes, I thought I was going to die. I did manage to make it the whole hour though… Hopefully, I will be able to use this devil to make me hot! Back to catching my breath! HA!
Month: April 2006
all about me
you can get a lot for $7.50 these days
by duane • • 22 Comments
I bet you are thinking, “what exactly can you get for $7.50, duane?”. Well, for one, that is the co-pay amount for my therapist, and for me, it afforded a diagnosis of depression and anxiety! I know that many of you that read the blog have seen my ups and downs over the last few months, and some of you have voiced concerns over sad poopie poems and whatnot, but don’t worry; I am getting help. I decided that the best thing for me to do is to go and talk with a therapist (who is probably reading this, Hi Joe!), because I pretty much knew what he was going to say. That’s not to say that it made it any easier to hear.
I just want to be able to fix what’s wrong and get to living my life. We discussed how anxiety has pretty much overwhelmed me, and it has led me into being depressed. Now I can explain all those down feelings I have been having! It is because of anxiety! Another thing that he told me, which I actually thought was kind of funny, is that I have lots of built up anger, and I release it through sarcasm, or I hold onto it, and it fuels the anxiety and depression. So my sarcasm is actually passive aggressive anger?! Never thought that! But perhaps that does explain why James always thinks I am being mean when I am sarcastic. I digress…
james says
the second installment of “funny things James says”
by duane • • 10 Comments
I have talked about the funny things that James says when he is abruptly woken up to be taken to bed before (remember the disassociated sternum?), and last night, I was treated to another gem. Naturally, I wrote that shit down so I could bring it straight to you. We all deserve a laugh. Here’s how our exchange went:
Me: Come on baby, do you want to go to bed?
James: Huh?
Me: Let’s go to bed.
James: I just think it’s funny you know?
Me: What’s that, babe?
James: Croutons.
Me: Croutons? What’s so funny about croutons?
James: Everybody wants them. Croutons. That’s funny, you know.
I can’t wait for the next installment of “funny things James says”! (I created a new category for these gems. I will hopefully have a lot to add over time!!!)
the catch-all-egory
the last of the questions
by duane • • 9 Comments
Somewhat bittersweet, I guess, since not that many questions were posed, but here are the answers to the last two. First, Terry asks if I believe in love and first sight, and the possibility of there being “the one”. First of all, I want to believe in love at first sight. I am a total romantic. I eat it up in movies. But in reality, I don’ t think that you can truly have love at first sight. What you feel may seem like love, but it probably isn’t love. While that may sound cynical, I just think that relationships take a lot of work, and if people base it off of their first meeting, it is going to be an uphill battle to say the least. It is great to think about, but in reality, hard to translate. As for there being “the one”, I also have to say I don’t believe in that either. I believe that there are many, and if you are lucky enough to find one of them (or if they find you), then there is no reason to “hold out” for this one person that you think exists. I have seen relationships (some of my own) end because the other person was looking for this one, and sometimes, I think that you can have something better if you just see what is right in front of you. I think that a lot of people fall in this trap, and if they start dating someone, and that person isn’t everything they had hoped for, they back out, and a lot of times, miss out on a potential great opportunity.
britney n' k-fed
Hey Britney,
by duane • • 12 Comments
STOP BREEDING WITH KEVIN FEDERLINE. Thanks!
all about me
tattoo phase two and more questions
by duane • • 13 Comments
Basically, he did all of the ginko leaves last night. I LOVE what he did, they look so wonderful. And they hurt! So here’s a bad picture:
Basically, the picture is bad because I took it. Through the mirror. In the bathroom. I will try and get James to take a better one tonight or something. Last night, when I left, he told me I could just leave the bandage on all night, so I did; putting one of those cling wrap bandages on is a bitch, and if someone else does it for me, I am all for it! Last night’s sitting was 2 hours, and I have one more marathon one left, until this thing is through! I have to say, I am excited… but I am also thinking of what I want to do next. All in good time. I am going to enjoy this finished for a bit before moving forward on anything new!!! Stay tuned. I FORGOT TO MENTION: Something funny happened last night while I was getting my tattoo, somehow the topic of the Indigo Girls was brought up (one of the artists did a tattoo for Michael Stipe, and Michael Stipe sang a song with the Indigo Girls), and so they wanted to hear that song. Then, they wanted to hear a few more. It was just interesting to be listening to the Indigo Girls in the tattoo shop. Also, everyone at that place is obsessed with myspace. I just don’t get it!?!
Now, for more questions. Wendy, I totally agree, I wish we lived closer. And on my ipod, hmm… go to this page, it will give you a good idea. Also, check out my singles page. That is also a good place. I haven’t added anything new to the ipod in a while, but I am getting that new Pink CD in a couple of days, and will be adding that! Brian, people are totally jealous of team awesome. Chris, team awesome is awesome, and it is made up of Brian and myself. We are not currently accepting applications for new members, but we will let you know if there is an open enrollment period any time soon. More specifically, here are the answers to your questions:
— How do I join? We are not accepting new members at this time, but thanks for your inquiry!
— Is it by invitation only? Hells yes.
— Are there initiation rituals? Not presently, but upon accepting new members, we are working on some good ones.
— Any hazing involved? Hopefully.
— Do I have to pay dues? Probably. But only you.
— Is there a cool t-shirt I get to were, declaring my membership in Team Awesome? That would be preferable. Currently, the default is anything Threadless.
Hope ya’ll are having a great day! I know I will be when I get to Sweetwater… must dull the pain!
the catch-all-egory
tattoo take two and answering question two
by duane • • 5 Comments
I am a dork, I was totally all just like, twoday must be twosday, huh? After I typed the title to this post. And then saw it was Tuesday. Dork! Anyway… Tonight I am going back for session two on the tattoo. I have no idea how much he will be able to do, but I hope it is a lot; tattoo healing sucks. The thought of having to do it again after this time sucks more. Expect ouchies and maybe even a picture later tonight. Or tomorrow.
Now to answer another question from the thread a few days ago; if James and I were to get married (yes please!), what would we register for? Well, we would probably just register for things we need, like Lowe’s gift cards, Target gift cards, and if they offer them, gift cards to the liquor store. That last one was a joke. Sort of. We registered for stuff when we moved into our house, and while some of our friends got us stuff, the main point was to get our parents to shell out for the cool crap (can you say Calphalon gift set? Because I have no problem saying it, or asking for it). But um, they didn’t bite that worm at all. In fact, we gots nothing (except some planting stuff and things from James’ mom). Parents are weird aren’t they? I guess another thing that we may do, is ask for donations towards a honeymoon. Since we aren’t going to have a “traditional” wedding, we will probably be forced to pay for a bunch of it, if not all of it, and we totally still deserve to have a kick ass honeymoon. I am thinking Hawaii or Maui bitches, so if the time comes to contribute, get out your checkbooks; we will come a calling.
Other than that, I don’t know? Eric, those that you mentioned all sounded like great places, so I guess to wrap up my answer, I think you should just register for what you need. That way, you won’t end up with two quesadilla makers.
show the love
how james and I first met
by duane • • 15 Comments
My post from the other day, or well, the lack thereof, produced some interesting questions that people are dieing to know, so I am here to oblige! Today’s question comes from Paulie, who wanted to know about how James and I first met. So here it is:
I used to work at Aid Atlanta, and while I was there, I worked as an outreach worker. This basically means I would go to Red Chair, hang out, hand out condoms, and do a little “announcement” of our services and what not during the drag show. Anyway. I was sitting there with my little box o’ condoms, and James was sitting across the room obviously eyeing me, and while I thought he was cute, I was in a relationship at the time, so I was definitely going to be a good boy. James finally came over to talk to us (there was another guy out with me that night doing outreach as well), and was asking some questions about how to reach his kids (since he can’t talk to them as a teacher). We talked a little about that, and I gave him an Aid Atlanta card, and he went on his way.
Then, later that week, my boss calls me giggling, into his office. He then shows me this email that was sent to the main website’s information account, and it was something to the degree of, “My name is James, I met your outreach worker Dwayne the other night…” blah blah blah. (Yep, that’s right, he misspelled my name! Huge pet peeve of mine, but I digress). The point was, that I apparently had made an impression on this boy, and he had come a calling. That’s when the picking on me started.
is it just me?
Harry Potter made me a witch!!!
by duane • • 12 Comments
First of all, I want to say thanks to all the questions on the open thread; keep them coming. I will address them this week! This is going to fun, as there are definitely some interesting ones there, and I look forward to writing about them! But for today, a quick rant (since a lot of people don’t read blogs on Saturdays).
Right now, there is a woman that is trying to get Harry Potter books banned in Gwinnett county (article). She claims that her daughter was turned onto the “dark life” of witchcraft after reading the Harry Potter series. The girl testified that Harry Potter has ruined her life by making her a witch, and she wants to save other children from the same fate. The mother then said that she believes by having these books in the library, that they are basically teaching and condoning witchcraft at school. But her quote is much better:
The books are indoctrinating children into witchcraft. It’s not mere fantasy.
So, um, yeah. Basically, I just want to know if this woman is completely insane, or just slightly off her rocker; we need to know what level of nutjob we are dealing with here. And I also want to have a talk with her retarded child. Basically, they are saying that against the will of this child, she was indoctrinated into witchcraft by reading a fantasy story about kids in fantasy situations. In fact, I bet seeing the movie sent her over the edge; because we all know how many kids out there are now wizards and witches because they read and saw Harry Potter movies. Hell, I even admit that I became a Hippogriff for a short while, so I guess I do see the potential for these books to “harm”. One night while practicing spells I learned in the Harry Potter books, one of them backfired, and I accidentally made James spit up slugs for over an hour. Seriously. I guess I do see the danger!
Wait a second, back to reality. WAKE UP YOU STUPID BITCH!!! If you can’t teach your children the difference between reality, and fantasy, they aren’t really going to have a place in society, so you better get to working on that. Taking away these books, which interestingly enough are pretty much single-handily credited with bringing back children of today’s desire to read, because your dumb daughter “fell deep into witchcraft” or because you believe that she was indoctrinated, is complete and utter ridiculousness. If you don’t want your kids to read them, then, um don’t let them! That is a novel concept. (hee hee, I said novel) Perhaps you are under some stupid spell or something, and that is how we must explain your rash and outlandish reactions. Yes, perhaps that is it. Or, more terrifyingly possible… Could it be? IS THIS WOMAN THE REINCANATION OF HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED???!?!? Dare I say it… Is Voldemort living in Gwinnett County???!?!?!
"pointless"
so basically, I guess I am not posting today!
by duane •
And, since I have never done this, I say, let’s do an open thread… say whatever. And, if you want to ask me anything, here’s your chance. Thanks to everyone who was nice yesterday, and liked the poem! Today is a much better day! Now get to telling me/asking me cool things! Weekend starts… NOW!